Episodes have naturally taken longer and longer to produce because I was frequently going back to polish existing content, and naturally, there was always more and more existing content. The current episode really is an oddball though because it's like reborn's gran pulse. not much story but suddenly just a lot to explore (and thereby to make). So lots to polish + lots to make = slow current episode.
But since you point it out, I might as well be completely honest. You're actually right that something happened in that December. In fact, I've been thinking about it a lot lately. So, no holds barred story time.
That thing was, I graduated.
And I know-- you're gonna say, "But Ame, if you graduated, shouldn't that mean you have more time, not less?" And yes-- it should. Here's the thing. Pretty much the entire time from the game's start to the time I graduated, I mostly worked on development during class. I'd be in the back on my laptop, pretending to diligently take notes when really I was just mapping away and only paying half-attention. I had nothing else to do in class and I obviously had to be there, so I was working on it pretty consistently. And aside from when I got excited about finishing an area or episode or something and worked for like three days straight, I pretty well neglected the project when I was home.
So I graduate, and that time where I can't do much of anything else goes out the window. Naturally I'd start working on it at home (and at work) more. The problem is, I actually still have the ability to do anything else in those places. And for better or worse, there are sooooo many things I'm interested in. Aside from my responsibilities on this site and at work, there's so many games and anime I want to get through, and I'm also very inclined to pursue things like art, music and writing (I was actually working on a novel before, but when Reborn took off I set it on the backburner). So I sometimes got distracted by those things.
Of course, I noticed this, and that dev time was padding out more than usual. So the logical conclusion for me to draw there was that I was being undisciplined and lazy. Stuff was getting done consistently when I was working consistently. Therefore, I should make myself work more and eliminate any distractions. Willpower over motivation. Good plan, right? And I was pretty good at implementing it, so I basically didn't let myself do anything other than work on the project. I don't remember exactly when, but it was quite a while. And when I still didn't see the results in timing I wanted, I continued to push myself to work harder and harder.
Predictably, it was still never enough. I think that had a lot to do with the fact that forcing myself to do something even if I would rather have been doing something else at the time, hurt my motivation a lot, which reflected itself in the actual pace and efficiency of the work (even if more time was being spent on it over all). Moreover, this is largely what has lead to my current health concerns.
I use the term of "health concern" pretty loosely, because it best sums it up, but what I deal with is psychosomatic chronic pain (specifically in my hands and lower back). Psychosomatic literally means mind-body, so something like this is relating to both mental and physical health, and how they interplay. In my case, self-imposed mental stress (always forcing myself to work, berating myself for not working fast enough, etc) resulted in tangible physical symptoms. I did my best to ignore them for a while, but it eventually got to the point where I was too weak to even click my mouse. Anyway, does that sound fake or what? I didn't really believe in that sort of thing, but after the most miserable several weeks of my life I was really desperate, so I started looking into that and-- surprise-- the treatment works.
That's an ongoing struggle though. And part of it has been about being honest with myself, only working on the game when I actually genuinely want to, and accepting that if this takes forever, whatever. And letting myself do other things that I neglected for the past however long. So all of that stuff I mentioned before, plus things I've got into more recently like LP'ing, studying Japanese, and the other two projects I'm working on. Actually prioritizing my mental health and enjoying things for a change, you know?
After forcing myself to work on Reborn consistently for so long, I was sort of burned out. And even now, it's really difficult for me to tell if I want to do something, or if I want to want to do something. But I'll figure it out. And the past few weeks I've felt like I'm starting to get that spark back. Does that mean development time's suddenly gonna pick up again? No, probably not. But it's not like I'm walking away for the project or anything. And the rest of y'all can wait.