Damn bro, I started reading this and almost immediately started worrying about you.
Maybe it's coincidence or something, today 2 years ago I sent feedback on V10, an email to tell you how much this game changed my life.
Since then I "learned" to do the things that bring me joy and happiness, to pursue what fuels my motivation and understood that some of the best things take time.
Take the time you need, you have been chipping at this project all year, give yourself some credit because you deserve it :)
Can't wait for V13 14 too