Suicide

[Ironbound]

I've dealt with my share of bullshit, familial issues and plenty of idiots and rascals who have tried to damage or sabotage me and my life, some even in high places. I hold the belief that life is a beautiful gift, that will always have at least one rose so enthralling that one endures even an ocean of thorns for its sake. To contemplate suicide is unbelievable to me, and I should say that to think of relinquishing this world merely for the sake of a class getting suspended, and that too because of some random lowbrows who have nothing to do with you, is not quite the deal, is it?

Please do not entertain suicide. It is never a solution. Be brave, be logical and be defiant. Life, after all, is by definition the struggle of a being to grow and develop under circumstances that try to prevent it. Your problems are definitely your own, and I cannot compare them with mine or anyone else's, but that is all the more reason to throw them down and stand victorious. After all, even in your case, you didn't even do something wrong to feel guilt about. Why not be happy in the things that you have and keep hope for a better future? Strive to have that goal, let it give meaning to life. Know that we are all friends here who wish you well.

On a sterner note, suicide is murder. No one has the right to murder anyone, especially not murder oneself.

Edited March 15, 2016 by Viridescent

[Chase]

On a sterner note, suicide is murder. No one has the right to murder anyone, especially not murder oneself.

Viri - you're a gentleman and a scholar.

Miss, I don't usually know now to attack a situation like this for someone else with the appropriate empathy - not that I lack it, but that the preservation of life is one that I value perhaps past the point of reason at times and when those I care about entertain the thought of voiding that life it makes me hurt for them - and I'm the kind of person that desperately searches for an immediate -and- ideal solution quickly.

A challenge that I picked up somewhere close to me is this - find joy in your trials, and rejoice. Silver linings are critical in getting off the mat and countering the attacks of life on the path to not only survival, but abundance.

...and also, we support you. Many of us, including myself, are great outlets if you would like to talk. Cheers.

[Skeleton]

yo girl ill be honest youre exaggerating over that suspension!! you did absolutely nothing wrong so why would it make you a failure???? parents are just being parents n shit there aint much to do about that next to accepting that theyre being horrible

just get some help for that depression its what i did and its working pretty ok right now?? but dont try to completely get rid of it because then youll be disappointed i guess so just try to live with it

if you can get help through school that would be neato, just tell them you dont want your parents to be involved and they should respect that

[Hect]

Can't really say more than: Don't do it. That way you don't only disappoint yourself, but also other people. I've had my fair share of experiences with that topic and came to regret it.

Long story short: Suicide is never a solution.

And yeah, even if it sounds corny - Don't lose hope. ^^ There's always people that care, no matter what. You just have to find them. And I'm also familiar with feeling like waste. xD In fact, I intend on making people hate me so it doesn't hurt when I lose them. Worked once and still hurts like hell. (Yup, backfired.) And the problem with school.. well, learn to "love" your haters. Don't take them serious. I had the same problem than you and got bullied as well, but I just stopped listening. They've lost their interest. Uhm.. well, I'm pretty bad at being comforting! So I'll end it here.

Bai.

Edited March 15, 2016 by Lagspike

[Felicity]

Step back and breathe. Then use a little logic. You'll come to the right conclusion.

[Cyaloom]

I often don't know what to say in these situations, or I fear I'll say the wrong thing. And there is not much that I can say and that everyone else hasn't told you yet. But I can't overlook this thread and pretend nothing happened.

I don't know how suspensions work there at college, but it is not your fault, and you are already well aware of that. Other people's judgment has only a relative importance, and shouldn't make you feel guilty for something you didn't do... Your own opinion comes first. Furthermore, you're not a failure just because someone tells you that. They probably don't even believe what they're telling you.

And even then, you still have a very large amount of people who care about you - just look at all the responses. Like the other users, I think you're not a failure.

I spend most of my free time procrastinating (killing time while I wait for tomorrow), without concluding anything, and that makes me feel like my life doesn't have a meaning and that I'm just draining air and money from my surroundings, but I never thought about suiciding, only about waiting for a better moment.

Now I can feel that moment is about to come: I've realized just in the last months that if I put some effort into it, I can get to know myself better and find the meaning of my life. And you can do the same; the moment will come for you as well. Now these are just my personal thoughts, but I believe it all has to do with the things you like.

Anything you're interested in can be very helpful: you've met all of us only because of your interest towards Pokemon, and this is just an example of how things you like (or people you like being with) can help you.

I don't really know how to say this, but I hope you get what I meant to say previously, after all. What can I say now, beside this... Don't suicide. Please.

I'll leave one song here too. Please listen to it, even if it isn't your favourite genre :]

[Cool Girl]

Thank you. I listened to the song and I cried because the lyrics really touched me. And yes, this is one of my favorite genres. Thank you! (Sorry, I'm crying right now because the song touched me!)

[CMV]

Forget about this idea, please. Everyone's life has a purpose, suicide is NEVER the solution to any problem that might arise - especially if we're talking about a 16 year old girl. Especially if it is triggered by something that is not even remotely your fault. People will continue telling you that you're nothing, that you're a worthless piece of dung - ignore them, whoever they are. They are not your judges. Don't take criticism too seriously, especially if it's not constructive at all. Most people are assholes, you have to accept this, move on and live your own life. You write the book, nobody else does. But if you fill the pages with "I'm a loser"s and "I'm a failure"s, you might as well title the book "I'm a loser and a failure", so basically don't do it. Fill the pages with positivity as much as you can. Spend time with whom you can rely on, whom you trust, in the outside world if possible (the Internet is scientifically confirmed to be depressing). I'm certain that you have people around you who can give you much more valuable advice than I ever could anonymously. Try talking to your parents about serious subjects, your thoughts, your concerns, at this stage in life they are supposed to be the people to fall back on. You should also talk to a psychologist (you'd be surprised how many people need one) if you haven't already. You will fit in if you try, if you hold on to the helping hands you may not even see yet.

Long story short, get these thoughts out of your mind. Don't hurt yourself.

I will be checking this thread again soon. More people love you than you think, take care!

[Stalkerkain]

Humans are irrational beings (lawls that's such a condescending thing to say). I personally seek instant gratification for many things I want.

I've had my share of bad days too, where I feel nothing is going right, where I might not even go into work because I can't get myself out of bed.

Every time I feel like "this is it, I'm going to do it", I do exactly what Dobby suggested.

Step back. Breathe.

I wait. I sleep. 99% of the time this was just a fleeting moment. After a day, maybe a week, I'm back to myself, and I tell myself:

"Hoo! Glad I didn't give into that single moment of weakness."

I always ask myself, if I were to be gone tomorrow, what would I miss?

And it's always the little things. I would miss watching Gintama (anime). I would miss calling friends up at 2am and getting a midnight snack.

There's a friggen' pile of games on my desk I haven't touched yet (I have to stop buying games).

You feel like you're a waste of space? That's fine. Nothing wrong with that. I feel that way sometimes too, and I just think that I should be selfish.

Sometimes I will grab a random friend (often its my best friend) and ask something completely selfish.

"Spend the day with me. Don't ask any questions."

Of course, he's like "wtf i have school but okay then." But he doesn't question me. He knows somethings up, but he doesn't know a single thing.

Find someone to bitch, to moan, to complain about all your problems. Have them babysit you.

If you don't have anyone like that, you're wrong.

We're here.

[Cool Girl]

Thank you, both of you.

Edited March 15, 2016 by Cool Girl

[Solarus]

I dunno how long the suspension is, but if it's a day it won't be so bad, I've been through Suicidal thoughts I know what it's like to feel worthless I do, I feel like I'm nothing, and just a burden to my family, but my friends have saved my life multiple times, because they talked to me, and made me feel like I have something to live for, but I do still think I'm useless, but remember, there's always someone who loves you, and I know, I'm not your friend, but I want to help ,so yeah, and I've thought about suicide around 5 times, like 3 of those times I was about to do it, but I didn't

Edited March 16, 2016 by Solarus

[Kookies]

Hello there! I should say, I've thought of commiting suicide before... twice. The first time I tried and failed.... I know perhaps I wasn't sure about doing it. The second time I just walked it off. The thing that I have learned from the time that I tried is that the people that truly love you will feel horrible. I didn't want anyone that I care for feel this way. It's just awful. Suicide is not only a burden for the person that is commting it to carry but also for the people that care for you. I may not know you but since you said that you are thinking about commiting suicide and the fact that I have felt the same way brings me closer to you. What I am trying to say is that there are more people than you think that care for you. Proof to what I am saying is the number of people that replied to your cry for help. So please don't make them worry don't make us worry!

This one is from R.E.M. a band that has written a couple of suicide songs.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ijZRCIrTgQc

Edited March 16, 2016 by Kookies

[SonOfRed]

Hey, I don't know you, but I do value life highly. Life does suck (especially high school) many people can relate their, it's a huge pressure that shouldn't be pushed onto the developing minds that build the future. It's hard to see the point when people only normally say meaningless things like "just keep going", or "it'll be alright". What I want to tell you is that life gets very wild and unpredictable after high school. I can almost guarantee you will blossom into a new person after you graduate. It's an amazing and life changing experience that really takes a weight off of your shoulders. I'm not asking you to not end your life, mostly because I've never gotten to that point before and I can't really judge, but what I do ask is that you give it time to let this amazing moment happen, because the change out of high school, whether it be college or not, is great and i wouldn't want a single person to miss it. I hate to see someone get so down and depressed that they feel ending their life would be better, but along with getting out of high school you'll start to realize that your own opinion about yourself trumps everyone else's opinion about you. Dick heads and assholes (this can include parents because they are ordinary people too) are just dick heads and assholes who try to make other people dick heads or assholes. Make yourself who you want to be, the person you want to influence to be more like you. Don't live in the shadows of others, maybe take a week to do solely the things you want to do. Also, this is a bit out there, but if you don't know Daniel Avidan, then read up on his life story if you can, he spent most of his life building himself based off of what he wanted to become, his family disapproved of it and he had to ask for a ton of help. Now he is moderately famous and he's just a really cool dude who is proud of the person he is. I think I've gotten a bit off track, but if anything just find who you want to be, don't lose sight of it, and become that person regardless of what other people think of you. One more thing, you are really brave to have asked for help, especially with a topic like this, so at the very least know that you have a very brave soul.

[Cool Girl]

Thank you. This kind of thing happened to me yesterday. But, I can say, that today, I'm feeling a lot better.

[SonOfRed]

Good, I love that this place is a huge family. If you ever feel like that, or even slightly depressed everyone here would be happy to help.

[Cool Girl]

Thanks! Oh, I forgot to tell you guys, there's other great news. They said they heard about what happened and had fired the school administrator for suspending the whole class. They will also take our suspension off our record! They said there was no reason for the rest of us to be suspended, so yeah, I'm really happy. All's well that ends well! Bad news: you won't believe why these guys got suspended (bear with me, but it's true and I'm pissed and ready to punch them in the face if that ever happened to me.) Ok, here's goes:

1) They were caught smoking weed.

2) They were caught drinking alcohol

3) This one is the worst, prepare yourself: they were caught peeking at girls in the changing room (you know, the room where they change their clothes for PE or athletic classes) I swear to god, if they ever did that to me, I'd kick their a** (I do national level martial arts, so yeah)

Yeah, what a crazy thing, but like I said, all's well that ends well! So, thank you guys for giving me advice and talking to me!

Edited March 17, 2016 by Cool Girl

[SonOfRed]

wow, what a bunch of idiots. I mean i did my fair share of drinking in high school, but i was smart and did it on my own time not near school. As for peeking on girls jeez what a bunch of pervs. How do you talk to a girl that knows you're a peeper?

[Cool Girl]

I know! Makes me want to kick their a**! Honestly! I'm still shocked from this. I mean, the worst part, is that I go to a private high school and you would think that a private school is safer than a public school!

[SonOfRed]

oh i feel you there haha, I went to a private school of about 200 kids and they do some really stupid shit. The worst part is that they feel like the biggest badasses, but they have no idea how mad a public school is.

[Cool Girl]

Well, whatever it is, I hope they didn't see me changing! (Aw man! Now, I'm scared!)

[SonOfRed]

Eh, I say the best thing to do is be confident, if they saw you don't be embarrassed just kick their pervy little asses with the rest of the girls they peeped on.

[Cool Girl]

Haha! Thanks!

[Halloween]

Okay, so I see that this shite is pretty much resolved so sorry if I'm just putting dirt in your cuts or whatever, but jesus. Gurrl. I've read your profile, you speak for fucking languages and play two sports at competitive level at fucking 16. let's just say you live up to your name. shit you'd make 16-year old me sigh and go back to eating ben and jerry.

HOWEVER everyone's entitled to feel down. your feelings aren't ridiculous and i disagree with people saying you're exaggerating/overreacting. pain is relative and you clearly put a lot of value into your education. Which is balls! 'cause highschool is a fat load of bullshit but the ones that care about it are usually the ones that grow up caring about their workplaces when they grow older and that should be treasured ya know.

anyway what i came here to say is that if you ever feel this way again, call a suicide hotline. 1-800-273-TALK (8255) is the first one I found, they should help ya. bunch a randos on a Pokémon site are great and all but it helps a ton to actually speak to a human being about feelings. you can talk to me too if you wanna, de hombre a hombre skype's makebates, tell me if you add me so i'll log in. 'cause it doesn't sound like the suspension is really what your depression is all about, even if that was the tipping point. Do you have a school counselor? they're usually pretty great too.

[Cool Girl]

Yeah, that's what I did. I talked to the school counselor and I felt so much better!

Edited March 18, 2016 by Cool Girl

[RainbowHugs]

I know I am a bit late with this, but I am sorry that you have been experiencing that... I have had to go through things like that, but that is me being expelled from my first high school, depression, cutting, abuse, bullying, thoughts of suicide, and I am still going through that, I am sorry you have had to go through that..