[CW] Proorismos

[SonOfRed]

Hey, this is kind of a ramble and not very well put together. Read at your own risk. I stopped in a weird spot, but i guess if some people want it to continue i can do it. Just don't wanna put time into something if it's not all that good. Welp, enjoy!

Clinging and cheering echo in a small bar in Opelika Alabama. I came to grab a couple of drinks, or maybe several. I haven't decided yet. All I know is that I need something right now, who wouldn't? I mean it's not that weird for guys to go to a bar after a break up. I don't know. I've never done it before. I mostly just play video games or sulk for a couple of months. I'm not even that big on drinking. So why do I even bother, I should just go home and start sulking.

I don't know why, I kept telling myself to go home, but for some reason I stayed. I sat at the bar, got the strongest drink i could buy and just drank like I was dying. I'm so stupid. I'm a lightweight. I should've stopped but no, I kept going until I passed out. I came to a couple of hours later and the bar was only half full now. The bartender was yelling at me to get out. I was dazed and confused, I wish I would've left immediately. Instead I made a scene. I yelled back, and before I knew it I put my fists up ready to fight. Bad idea. I don't remember what happened next, but I can imagine the bouncer kicked the absolute dog shit out of me. Serves me right, I'm a low life.

Next thing I remember was me picking myself up off of the curb. My clothes are disgusting and my breath smells worse than the bar I was just thrown out of, so what better to celebrate my current situation than to through a temper tantrum like a two year old. I screamed and flailed for about five minutes and sat down on the curb, and put my face in my hands. I heard a voice speak up, "You know, I'm sure your shit will be okay if you just complain and whine some more". Without even picking my head up I of course had to give a smart alec remark. "Yeah, and what exactly do you know about shit going wrong, asshole?", I said. God I'm such a selfish prick. I picked my head up and there's this lanky beggar sitting a little ways away from me. "Oh, I'm fairly certain I know just a tad more than you, dick", he said in a sarcastic tone. "But no, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.", he barked "What in fucks name happened to you, you little piece of shit"! "Well", I hesitated because who the fuck wouldn't in this situation,"My fiance left me, and she won't tell me why". "Obviously she doesn't want to be with you anymore. Problem solved", he quickly stated. "Shut up you old fuck, you don't know anything about our relationship", I yelled as I stood up. He didn't even look my way, and just said," don't need to know anything about either of you, but if she left then she obviously doesn't want to spend her life with you. That seems pretty simple". I don't know if it was the alcohol or the conversation that did it, but I kind of snapped at him. "And what do you know about love you lonely piece of shit! Why would anyone ever love someone like you, you've amounted to nothing but a stain on the sidewalk people avoid just so they don't have to smell you", I yelled as if to let the whole world know I was pissed. Goddammit I'm such an asshole right now, Why didn't I just go home and sulk like normal?

The beggar why quite for a little while, I kind of got scared of what he'd do, so I put my fists up ready to fight. "Put your fists down you little prick, I'm not gonna beat you up just because you're an asshole", he said as he looked up at me. "You wanna know what love really is?", he continued, "then take a seat and I'll tell you a story about love, and you let me know if your petty relationship has anything on what I had". I sat down and he wiped his face. Jesus, did I make this guy cry. What kind of person does that to a man without anything. God fucking dammit I'm such a punk.

"Now get good and comfortable, because this story starts way before I even met this girl.", he said. Jesus Christ, I really hope he doesn't drag this along, but dammit I've been such an asshole to this guy. The least I can do is listen, at least for a little bit. At least it's not that late yet.

"Imagine as best you can, a young high-schooler in his sophomore year. He's never really been in any meaningful relationships, just a couple of embarrassing flings that all ended because he could never work up the courage to even kiss a girl. That was me in high school. Friends weren't exactly a big thing either. I had them, but they weren't really friends, more like people who would tolerate me. It was always hard to hang out with them. Uncomfortable, kind of like accepting a present you really didn't want. The school had quite a few people I can remember. There was a boy named Hunter who was my closest friend at the time. A group of snobby frat boy wannabe's named Nathan, Kenneth, and Jay. A clique that had a bunch of snobby girls named Erika, Sam, Lily, Maddie, Taylor, and their gay friend Thomas. I can remember some younger students who would hang out, Frank, Josh, Emily, Jack, and this new girl Meredith. And or course there were the kids who never really fit in any group. A couple of guys, Jake and Drew where their names I believe, and a couple of girls. Lets see, I think their names were Michaela, Diana, and Rebecca. Now of course these weren't all of them, but I think they're all that's important to the story", he said staring into the sky.

"Now it was about mid-way through my sophomore year, I still hadn't hardly found my place. I had bounced between friends for a while. Eventually I found myself with the snobs. I ended up dating Sam, and somehow I just slowly started making her friends mine. That went on for about two years. Wow, it's hard to imagine I was even in a relationship that long. Not by choice I don't think, more like habit. I had put up with her and known her for so long that it would be hard to try to start over with someone else. However it did end, and it messed me up. I knew she was bad for me, and everyone else knew it too. I just couldn't go back to bouncing between cliques. We ended up taking a bit of time apart to see where things could go for us. In hindsight, I was an idiot to think that would work. She went to Europe on a school trip. Around this time a new girl came to our school from Florida. Her name was Lara and her and I got along great. She was so much fun to hang out with, and her and I became very close friends by the time Sam went on her trip. She was gone for about a week and the whole time we hung out and hiked and just did things most of our other classmates wouldn't do. Being a senior now I could drive and Lara and I drove all over the town we lived close to. I spent more time with her than I did Sam when we were together. Of course Sam and I were still trying to work things out and we texted each other almost every day while she was gone. About 4 days went by while she was in Europe and I hadn't gotten a response from her all day. I wasn't too worried though, it's Europe and easy to get sidetracked. Unfortunately she ended up not texting back the rest of her trip. This of course got me worried. She got back and I went to talk to her face to face and to welcome her back. She ignored me. When I did get to talk to her I brought up us and how i thought we could work out if we both tried. She told me how she got with another man while she was in Europe. I was so angry I demanded she tell me why she would do that. She told me because I got with another girl. I lashed back saying I was faithful and good to her, and would never do something like that. She didn't believe me. Apparently one of her friends saw how much Lara and I had been hanging out and thought her and I were dating. She took the word of her friends over the word of her two year boyfriend. I was devastated, I was young and I'd never had anything like that happen to me. I went into a bit of a depression, but probably the best thing that could've happened to me came out of this. The misfits of the school, most of us came together and started hanging out. Jake, and I used to play video games every day together after school. Lara and I would talk all of the time, she told me about her boyfriend and ask advice about her life. Michaela joined up with us, ad even though we never really got close her and I could hang out without hesitation. There was this other boy, a bit of a social butterfly, everyone called him Boomer. He became a strong part of our group. The girl who was new my sophomore year, Meredith, her and I would talk about random things and Rebecca would come with us to hang out on the mountain we lived close to. This went on for most of my senior year, but of course with how close I was to some of these girls. I developed feelings beyond friends. Lara of course had a boyfriend and Meredith was talking to a boy named Frank. I know I had feelings for them, but I knew I couldn't act because they already had boyfriends, so I waited. While I waited Lara and I would talk. She came to me one day sad and in tears, she had been thinking about breaking up with her boyfriend to find someone else because he was still in Florida. My heart raced, I knew this was my chance, but something came over me. Kind of like guilt, but I didn't feel bad. I told her to stick with her boyfriend and that they would be happy together. It was that moment that i had decided that i didn't love Lara as much as her boyfriend did. I still had feeling for Meredith, but because of this I didn't really know how to feel about them. She was with Frank, but there relationshiip wasn't anything special. He had mostly been with the snobby girl Lily, and it was obvious to see he just dated Meredith to make her jealous. Surely enough I was right, and they broke up a couple of days later. I still didn't know how to feel. I kept a bit of distance from Meredith, but fate would have it another way. When the friend group wanted to hang out it would normally just end up being Lara, Jake, Meredith and myself. Lara and Jake ended up developing feelings for each other, but Lara never dumped her boyfriend so nothing ever happened between them, but they were still close. Closer than how Lara and I were. So with them being close naturally Meredith and I became much closer. We would hang out and text each other often. The whole time my feelings for everyone else died down, but the ones for her kept getting stronger. Some girl I never talked to for all of high school, and now due to some weird twist of fate we ended up becoming close. I should stop here for now", he said as he leaned back. "What", I said turning towards the beggar," why are you stopping now?" He chuckled a little and simply said, "I'm sure you will have something to do tomorrow and it's pretty late, if you want to know more there is always tomorrow. I don't really go anywhere". "Shit, what time is it!", I exclaimed as I looked and my watch,"I've gotta get back to my apartment!

I bolted without even saying goodbye to the man. Damn, I was just a total dick to him through and through. I guess I can make it up to him tomorrow. I'll get him something to eat and some clothes. He looked like he had worn that shirt for months. Well, It's the least I can do. At least for a little bit he distracted me from my problems, it's more than the alcohol did.