[OOC/Signups] Fate/Another Story

[Noir]

Be that as it may.

I've polished my submission regardless like you asked and will become a Counter Guardian in this RP, and in that case I'm fine with having only one NP as of the moment.

[rustytengo]

I think i broke something.....

Character (RPer):Samson(rustytengo)

Classes: Berserker

Alignment: Chaotic mad???(honestly i can't really say what his would be so i will use Hercules original aliment for him)

Parameters

Strength: EX(E- if his hair is cut)

Endurance: A++(E-if his hair is cut)

Agility: C+(E- if his hair is cut)

Mana: D+(E- if his hair is cut)

Luck: D+(E- if the opponet is a woman)

Phantasm: A(not actually sure here he has powerful NP but his strongest two are passive so they really don't cost much)

Class Skills

Mad Enhancement: B (Rank up for all parameters, but takes away most of sanity.)

Personal Skills

Instinct: B

Gate Breaker:A (Samson tore of the gate of the walls of Giza gives him a bonus at destroying walls and barriers)

Magic Resistance: A (only as long as his hair is not cut)

Divinity: D (was born a Nazirite one of Gods favored people)

Noble Phantasms:

Hair of the Nazirite: EX (Divine Enhancement) Samsons Hair. Grants him his strength as well as makes him nearly invincible to most damage except from NP of B or higher though the wounds heal extremely fast. A Blessing from God himself though if cut off he loss all divine help. (Can only be cut of by NP of B or higher or by his master and by cutting i mean at least the majority of his hair not a few strands in battle.)

Ass' Jaw Bone: C (Anti-Army): the jaw bone he used to kill 1,000 Philistines.

Destruction of the Temple of Dagon: A++ (Anti-Fortress): At his death Samson brought down the Temple of Dagon in Giza killing more in his death then in his life. This Noble Phantasms is the embodiment of that deed. At his death he unleashing all of the the Mana sustaining him causing a massive explosion of pure magical energy.

[Tartar]

This sounds fun, I've never read any of the Fate/Stay works, but I've seen the anime. So tell me if I do something wrong when describing this Servant, or even if he can be considered a servant... Though certainly he is an odd one to pick, hopefully you'll like it

Alonso Quijano AKA Don Quixote de la Mancha(Tartar):
Classes: Saber, Lancer, Rider (in truth he could be any of the three)
Alignment: Lawful Good

Parameters
Strength: C
Endurance: C

Agility: E

Mana: C
Luck: A+
Phantasm: B+++

Class Skills
Skill1: Magic Resistance E
Skill2 Riding

Personal Skills
Skill 1: Great Country-wide Crossing: C

Skill 2: Bravery B

Skill 3: Mental Disorder A:

- Kinda. As Alonso Quijano this servant is perfectly sane, rational and intelligent. But as Don Quixote de la Mancha the servant is prone to acts of tomfoolery and stupidity.

Skill 4: Pioneer of The Stars: A

- This servant's life and experience was a turning point in human history in two ways. Firstly the books based on this servant created what is today known as the modern novel and pioneered literary techniques never used before, and adopted and by all other literary artists after. And also this man became the living embodiment of the end of the age of Heroes, as he pioneered the age of deconstructive literature and heralded the coming of the modern age. As a testament to his achievements this servant has been graced with this skill-

Noble Phantasms:
Potion of Miracles ( C ):

- In his legend this servant could create a life regenerating potion from everyday ingredients, which can be used to heal all wounds, without the use of mana. Though the potion is so disgusting and foul that only Don Quixote can stomach drinking it, and it is like poison to anyone else, though this isn't lethal, merely forcing anyone drinking it to vomit and pass out. And even when Don Quixote drinks it he is knocked unconscious for up to an hour while the healing process takes place.

Squirehood ( B )

- Don Quixote's "servant" Sancho bears almost as much fame as himself. This phantasm is a crystallization of Don Quixote's ability to inspire undying loyality and awaken latent abilities in any person he deems worthy as being his squire, allowing one person of his choice to fight like a weak servant.

Slayer of Windmills (A) (Anti-Fortress)

- This phantasm embodies the most famous aspect of this Servant's legend, and allows him to strike buildings and large foes, and fight them as if they were much smaller and more fragile than they in reality are. Also forces any hidden foes in a large radius around the spot where this Phantasm is used, out of stealth.

The Infinite Dreamer A+)

- This servant is perhaps the youngest of all Knightly Servants, but due to his undying conviction and belief in his own abilities heroism, he summons a reality marble wherein The Age of Heroes is made manifest, allowing him to act like a Servant thousands of years older than he really is, boosting his skills considerably and allowing him to fight heroes much stronger than himself.

End of the Gods: (EX)

- This skill is embodied by Don Quixote's Golden Helmet: "The Helmet of Mambrino" the ancient Moorish king. Though in reality it's a fake, and the only powers besowed upon it are those from "The Infinite Dream".

Normally this skill is sealed by the existence of "Mental Disorder" and "The Infinite Dreamer", as Don Quixote's belief in his heroism is unshakable. But should his madness ever be pierced and his perception of the world shattered, this skill will immediately activate, and the Helmet of Mambrino turns into a simple Barber's Basin, the embodiment of all things mundane. This immediately signals' end of The Age of Gods, and imposes the qualities of the mundane upon any target within a large radius around Don Quixote, canceling all Noble Phantasms and lowers the parameters of any hero significantly, but those with exceptional willpower. This aura also weakens any magic users around the target.

Once this skill is used The Infinite Dreamer Noble Phantasm is destroyed and the traits Pioneer of The Stars, and Mental Disorder are lost.

Hopefully you liked this, and please comment if anything I noted is too strong, or his stats are too great. I purposefully tried lowering his stats to levels lower than all other heroes presented here (having a total parameter strength of 190...) And hopefully Don Quixote can be qualified as a hero, despite being a fictional character and not a propper legend.

Edited August 13, 2016 by Tartar

[Noir]

This sounds fun, I've never read any of the Fate/Stay works, but I've seen the anime. So tell me if I do something wrong when describing this Servant, or even if he can be considered a servant... Though certainly he is an odd one to pick, hopefully you'll like it

Alonso Quijano AKA Don Quixote de la Mancha(Tartar):

Classes: Saber, Lancer, Rider (in truth he could be any of the three)

Alignment: Lawful Good

Parameters

Strength: C

Endurance: C

Agility: E

Mana: C

Luck: A+

Phantasm: B+++

Class Skills

Skill1: Magic Resistance E

Skill2 Riding

Personal Skills

Skill 1: Great Country-wide Crossing: C

Skill 2: Bravery B

Skill 3: Mental Disorder A:

- Kinda. As Alonso Quijano this servant is perfectly sane, rational and intelligent. But as Don Quixote de la Mancha the servant is prone to acts of tomfoolery and stupidity.

Skill 4: Pioneer of The Stars: A

- This servant's life and experience was a turning point in human history in two ways. Firstly the books based on this servant created what is today known as the modern novel and pioneered literary techniques never used before, and adopted and by all other literary artists after. And also this man became the living embodiment of the end of the age of Heroes, as he pioneered the age of deconstructive literature and heralded the coming of the modern age. As a testament to his achievements this servant has been graced with this skill-

Noble Phantasms:

Potion of Miracles ( C ):

- In his legend this servant could create a life regenerating potion from everyday ingredients, which can be used to heal all wounds, without the use of mana. Though the potion is so disgusting and foul that only Don Quixote can stomach drinking it, and it is like poison to anyone else, though this isn't lethal, merely forcing anyone drinking it to vomit and pass out. And even when Don Quixote drinks it he is knocked unconscious for up to an hour while the healing process takes place.

Squirehood ( B )

- Don Quixote's "servant" Sancho bears almost as much fame as himself. This phantasm is a crystallization of Don Quixote's ability to inspire undying loyality and awaken latent abilities in any person he deems worthy as being his squire, allowing one person of his choice to fight like a weak servant.

Slayer of Windmills (A) (Anti-Fortress)

- This phantasm embodies the most famous aspect of this Servant's legend, and allows him to strike buildings and large foes, and fight them as if they were much smaller and more fragile than they in reality are. Also forces any hidden foes in a large radius around the spot where this Phantasm is used, out of stealth.

The Infinite Dreamer A+)

- This servant is perhaps the youngest of all Knightly Servants, but due to his undying conviction and belief in his own abilities heroism, he summons a reality marble wherein The Age of Heroes is made manifest, allowing him to act like a Servant thousands of years older than he really is, boosting his skills considerably and allowing him to fight heroes much stronger than himself.

End of the Gods: (EX)

- This skill is embodied by Don Quixote's Golden Helmet: "The Helmet of Mambrino" the ancient Moorish king. Though in reality it's a fake, and the only powers besowed upon it are those from "The Infinite Dream".

Normally this skill is sealed by the existence of "Mental Disorder" and "The Infinite Dreamer", as Don Quixote's belief in his heroism is unshakable. But should his madness ever be pierced and his perception of the world shattered, this skill will immediately activate, and the Helmet of Mambrino turns into a simple Barber's Basin, the embodiment of all things mundane. This immediately signals' end of The Age of Gods, and imposes the qualities of the mundane upon any target within a large radius around Don Quixote, canceling all Noble Phantasms and lowers the parameters of any hero significantly, but those with exceptional willpower. This aura also weakens any magic users around the target.

Once this skill is used The Infinite Dreamer Noble Phantasm is destroyed and the traits Pioneer of The Stars, and Mental Disorder are lost.

Hopefully you liked this, and please comment if anything I noted is too strong, or his stats are too great. I purposefully tried lowering his stats to levels lower than all other heroes presented here (having a total parameter strength of 190...) And hopefully Don Quixote can be qualified as a hero, despite being a fictional character and not a propper legend.

Alright, I have a few questions on this. Take note that these questions come from a person that's actually read official translated versions of the literature you are referencing (though my memory of it is no longer as fresh), and I mean no antagonism whatsoever, so please bear with a few moments of my bluntness, and forgive my any instances for being unable to supress my spitefulness.

Probably the biggest elephant in the room at a glance in terms of Phantasms is your Squirehood Phantasm. You do realize that Sancho followed Don Quixote followed him out of anything but loyalty for most of the story, and no one but him ended up being loyal in the end, right (that also had issues)? Sancho was, in all, a foolish, uneducated, illiterate man (who somehow takes pride in it) who followed Don Quixote as he was promised a handsome reward (when he didn't even know what it was, so Don Quixote could've promised him useless stuff and Sancho would've thought the same as he doesn't know what words are) and his family wanted it too. He did it out of pure greed and desire but is patient for the reward and he does question, go against, and deceive Don Quixote in several instances of their travels. The whole idea of Sancho was "the trusty sidekick that existed because every good hero needs one", but your depiction of Don Quixote being able to garner loyalty and grant power in such a way is just wrong. If anything, people who acquiesced to Don Quixote did it out of the context of "fuck it, this guy's too annoying, let's lie to him so he'll gtfo". People burned his books that made him insane and said wizards burned them and lots of other instances. Don Quixote garnered anything but loyalty, and Sancho was the one that halted the maddened adventures in the end.

Of course, you could argue that you're doing this under the context of Don Quixote living his illusionary life and these powers embody what he sees alone, but that's basically the equivalent of turning your thoughts into reality, which is in my personal opinion, a heavy no-no for stuff like this, at least in this kind of phantasm in particular. In fact, I'd detract from my personal statement and say that this "depiction of a world you only see and applying it to reality and others around it" is probably the most conspicuous issue I'm seeing here.

Even then, some of your Phantasms and their applications don't even make full sense and are conflicted in a variety of ways. Firstly, what do some of these Phantasms and skills aim to serve in the battlefield? What does the pioneering in literature help in battle prowess and other important things? Even then, why is this credited to him? He didn't pioneer literature, the author did by writing about him, that doesn't make Don Quixote the creator of it. It should be credited to the author, who depicted the character, and it's not like it serves a particular purpose rather than being a fancy title. Canonically, servants cannot form contracts with other servants, so the imbuement aspect of your Squirehood Phantasm is questionable. The practicality of the potion Phantasm is also questionable; if you're to faint for an hour after drinking it, how is that going to help you in battle rather than speed up your death when clashes occur?

Your depiction of Don Quixote has two different personalities, a sober one and one that is "prone to acts of tomfoolery and stupidity." That's quite an understatement for who he really is, considering he's living in a fully delusional world where he only sees things through his eyes. He snapped because he decided he would call his neighbour the best girl in the world and read too much chivalrous literature, and the story's whole theme centers on his seemingly tragicomic crusade of overcoming the nihilism that is the lack of literary elements depicted in the stuff he reads in life. Another thing that isn't explained is the line between his sober and insane side. What triggers and allows him to alter between the two? This is even more relevant especially in tandem with your EX Phantasm, which, apart from being obviously OP, also relies on his current state of mind. If he had the ability to swap minds easily he could easily just spam this EX and even if it was hard, this instance of your EX Phantasm shouldn't be acceptable. Surpressing Noble Phantasms, reducing parameters, and magic? Anyone can tell you that's stupid and I'm pretty sure a combination like this doesn't exist canonically, though forgive me if I'm wrong. Losing something that's irrelevant to battle and another god-playing Phantasm isn't too fair of a trade, either.

Your depiction of Slayer of Windmills also is very generalized and vague. Try to make more action occur when explaining your Phantasms. There are many ways to fight a windmill, we want to know how, not the fact that you can do it. Also, with apologies if saying this a bit stupid, but I think most of us would also prefer a minimal amount of NPs rather than a large amount of them.

The OP has requested that all characters should have a depiction as close to the original as possible, and simply put, your depiction is lacking in that department. It's not a lost cause, but try to dig a little deeper for things like this.

Edited August 13, 2016 by YagamiNoir4896

[Shamitako]

Oi, Rusty, one thing: WTF does the Jaw Bone actually do?

[rustytengo]

Oi, Rusty, one thing: WTF does the Jaw Bone actually do?

for the most part not much since its true power is sealed because Berserker. so it just acts like a weapon of the rank. Though i probably should of said something along that line.

Alternatively it could just unleash giant shock waves when swung cleaving through all enemies in its path....hmm that makes a bit of more sense for an anti-army NP. though its not like he needs more.

[Tartar]

Here's a response to YagamiNoir, which I've put in spoilers due to it being quite long:

YagamiNoir4896, thanks for the large post and the constructive criticism. I'm sure it took a lot time to write, so I'll try to adress some of the issues you raised with my frankly, flawed concept.

Probably the biggest elephant in the room at a glance in terms of Phantasms is your Squirehood Phantasm. You do realize that Sancho followed Don Quixote followed him out of anything but loyalty for most of the story, and no one but him ended up being loyal in the end, right (that also had issues)? Sancho was, in all, a foolish, uneducated, illiterate man (who somehow takes pride in it) who followed Don Quixote as he was promised a handsome reward (when he didn't even know what it was, so Don Quixote could've promised him useless stuff and Sancho would've thought the same as he doesn't know what words are) and his family wanted it too. He did it out of pure greed and desire but is patient for the reward and he does question, go against, and deceive Don Quixote in several instances of their travels. The whole idea of Sancho was "the trusty sidekick that existed because every good hero needs one", but your depiction of Don Quixote being able to garner loyalty and grant power in such a way is just wrong. If anything, people who acquiesced to Don Quixote did it out of the context of "fuck it, this guy's too annoying, let's lie to him so he'll gtfo". People burned his books that made him insane and said wizards burned them and lots of other instances. Don Quixote garnered anything but loyalty, and Sancho was the one that halted the maddened adventures in the end.

As you pointed out, loyalty was perhaps the wrong word to use. The main point of the NA was that we could get people to join in on his vision, and get them to believe in the things he did, and thus his power would be shared with them. And really, despite Sancho's main reason for joining Quixote being the promise of an insula, he did over time start to believe wholeheartedly in Don Quixote and his madness, and there was certainly a level of admiration and loyalty in his towards his master towards the end of the book.

But you're right, Sancho's belief in his master's madness and his loyalty towards him came over time, rather than as a result of charisma or loyalty. Though I still think this NA could be used, though rephrased in such a way as that he can make a person of his choice share in his vision, and thus gain power from it.

Of course, you could argue that you're doing this under the context of Don Quixote living his illusionary life and these powers embody what he sees alone, but that's basically the equivalent of turning your thoughts into reality, which is in my personal opinion, a heavy no-no for stuff like this, at least in this kind of phantasm in particular. In fact, I'd detract from my personal statement and say that this "depiction of a world you only see and applying it to reality and others around it" is probably the most conspicuous issue I'm seeing here.

This is kinda the main problem with picking a character like Don Quixote as a Servant, since he certainly wasn't a heroic figure, but merely an elderly man living out his fantasies. So in the end the only way to make such a servant work is to give him a NA which actually turns his visions into reality.

Also the Holy Grail can power up Servants with skills and strength beyond those they had in life, so perhaps his powers could be explained by the grail giving him the strength to manipulate reality to make him on par with other servants?

Even then, some of your Phantasms and their applications don't even make full sense and are conflicted in a variety of ways. Firstly, what do some of these Phantasms and skills aim to serve in the battlefield? What does the pioneering in literature help in battle prowess and other important things? Even then, why is this credited to him? He didn't pioneer literature, the author did by writing about him, that doesn't make Don Quixote the creator of it. It should be credited to the author, who depicted the character, and it's not like it serves a particular purpose rather than being a fancy title. Canonically, servants cannot form contracts with other servants, so the imbuement aspect of your Squirehood Phantasm is questionable. The practicality of the potion Phantasm is also questionable; if you're to faint for an hour after drinking it, how is that going to help you in battle rather than speed up your death when clashes occur?

The pioneer of the stars skill was perhaps making to many logical leaps to apply to the Don. I kinda wanted a skill which could be used in tandem with Eternal Dreamer to make the impossible possible for the Servant. Though in actuality you're probably right in the fact that the skill doesn't apply to him, as the skill is originally reserved for inventors.

Your depiction of Don Quixote has two different personalities, a sober one and one that is "prone to acts of tomfoolery and stupidity." That's quite an understatement for who he really is, considering he's living in a fully delusional world where he only sees things through his eyes. He snapped because he decided he would call his neighbour the best girl in the world and read too much chivalrous literature, and the story's whole theme centers on his seemingly tragicomic crusade of overcoming the nihilism that is the lack of literary elements depicted in the stuff he reads in life. Another thing that isn't explained is the line between his sober and insane side. What triggers and allows him to alter between the two? This is even more relevant especially in tandem with your EX Phantasm, which, apart from being obviously OP, also relies on his current state of mind. If he had the ability to swap minds easily he could easily just spam this EX and even if it was hard, this instance of your EX Phantasm shouldn't be acceptable. Surpressing Noble Phantasms, reducing parameters, and magic? Anyone can tell you that's stupid and I'm pretty sure a combination like this doesn't exist canonically, though forgive me if I'm wrong. Losing something that's irrelevant to battle and another god-playing Phantasm isn't too fair of a trade, either.

Regarding the EX phantasm, I put it in there as a flashy send-off skill, not something that could be spammed. As merely using it destroys his main NP, and leaves him as a subpar and mentally broken servant with weak fighting capabilities. Perhaps I didn't communicate well enough the fact that the moment he used the skill he wouldn't be able to do anything.

And regarding Slayer of Windmills, I was actually supposed to delete it before posting as I found it too vague and slightly worthless, but forgot. Sorry.

All in all I think I'll scrap the character and think of something new. I think there were a lot of fun ideas in there that could be used and even salvaged into a good servant, but roleplaying someone who's mentally handicaped and prone to idiocy is going to be quite difficult, so I'm better off trying to do something else.

Ps. I think you're overestimating his stupidity, as he was in the end quite a smart and had a lot of good qualities, even when doing thoughtless and rash actions with no basis in reality.

[Chevaleresse]

I like the idea of the servant, really, so I would be somewhat disappointed to see him scrapped, but I wasn't a huge fan of the execution of the version you posted.

[rustytengo]

just to correct something Tartar. Pioneer of the Stars isn't just for inventors. To quote the wiki on the description of it "Pioneer of the Stars is the unique Skill given to heroes that became turning points in the human history. All difficult voyages and challenges which are considered "impossible" turn into "events that can be realized". The cannon servants who who have it are Tesla, Francis Drake, and Da Vinci.

Tesla because he "tamed" electricity and Drake for circumnavigating the world for the first time, and Da Vinci for well his inventions.

though i do agree he would be very hard servant to role play though it would of been a fun character to see played sad to see him go.

Though just for clarification servants and NP don't just have to meant for battle. I mean Shakespeare,Mozart,Hans Christian Anderson, and Florence Nightingale are all servants. hell another servant has a NP that creates a infinite amount of food.(mainly rice)

[Tartar]

Okay, I may reconsider the servant, as I do in fact like the idea.

What exactly were the problems with the first draft, and how could I address the problems in a possible future version? Should the character be a super weak regular person with something along the lines of E in every stat, and have this incredibly powerful Noble Phantasm which projects his view of the world onto others and makes him equal in power to other servants, or should he just be a regular servant with powers equal to what he himself imagines him to have?

And how could I fix the Squirehood NA, since I think it's a neat idea.

And once more, should I write him as if he's a fictional character written by an author, and his Servant status comes from him being a part of people's collective consciousness (is this even allowed?), or should I write him as a real character whose actions and traits have over time been embellished and falsified by authors to make a mockery of the man, or even a real character who is exactly like described in the book, with powers granted to him by the grail (perhaps something like affections of the Holy Grail could be used to give a boost in power?)

Honestly, I started writing a sheet for Kongming, only to realize that he was already a canon Servant...

[Chevaleresse]

Just. . . bring him down to the level that he should be at. He's well-known but he doesn't have this massive legend that other heroes have surrounding them. He shouldn't have tons of powerful NPs, he should have one or two.

I would take the second option, there.

[rustytengo]

Okay, I may reconsider the servant, as I do in fact like the idea.

What exactly were the problems with the first draft, and how could I address the problems in a possible future version? Should the character be a super weak regular person with something along the lines of E in every stat, and have this incredibly powerful Noble Phantasm which projects his view of the world onto others and makes him equal in power to other servants, or should he just be a regular servant with powers equal to what he himself imagines him to have?

And how could I fix the Squirehood NA, since I think it's a neat idea.

And once more, should I write him as if he's a fictional character written by an author, and his Servant status comes from him being a part of people's collective consciousness (is this even allowed?), or should I write him as a real character whose actions and traits have over time been embellished and falsified by authors to make a mockery of the man, or even a real character who is exactly like described in the book, with powers granted to him by the grail (perhaps something like affections of the Holy Grail could be used to give a boost in power?)

Honestly, I started writing a sheet for Kongming, only to realize that he was already a canon Servant...

best way i can think of to incorporate a lot of the ideas would be to just give him one NP which is a Reality Marble where his fantasies are made real or something along those lines. His parameters seem fine to me though i don't know the story having never read it. all i know is that its the second most printed book next to the bible, and its old.

servants who are purely fictional are allowed give the story is old enough(hell the first servant i put up was Jack the Giant Killer who wasn't ever real). Though do to how servants are wrote just go with "as a real character whose actions and traits have over time been embellished and falsified by authors to make a mockery of the man"

that's what i would do it it was me.

yeah Grand Order made it a lot harder to find none cannon servants.

Edited August 13, 2016 by rustytengo

[Shamitako]

for the most part not much since its true power is sealed because Berserker. so it just acts like a weapon of the rank. Though i probably should of said something along that line.

Alternatively it could just unleash giant shock waves when swung cleaving through all enemies in its path....hmm that makes a bit of more sense for an anti-army NP. though its not like he needs more.

Nah, having it just be a weapon is fine, it was just unclear. When he used it originally he fought without shockwaves and still wrecked an army Also Nessie cleaves shockwaves through things so I would feel as though my monopoly were being usurped upon

Edit: Lemme grab another one from EV that I liked a lot

Character (RPer): Red Riding Hood, the Wolf Bringer (Alexus/SYLPHYN)

Classes: Rider, Caster, Berserker

Alignment: Neutral Evil

Parameters [brackets are stats gained from assimilating Susi]

Strength: E

Endurance: C

Agility: D [A]

Mana: C [D]

Luck: D [D]

Phantasm: C

Class Skills

Riding A+

Magic Resistance B

Personal Skills

Magecraft B (Red’s magic is on par with a powerful magus of modern day. Her magic is specialized for manipulating the living and dead bodies of mammals)

Self-Modification A (Red has the ability to fuse her body with any living creature, temporarily taking on its physical traits. In the short term this has no adverse effects, but using a creature for too long will result in its death)

Mad Enhancement C (Active only when her hood is down. Although maintaining most of her personality, Red becomes overwhelmed with the desire to kill and assimilate that her magic causes)

Noble Phantasms:

Red Riding Hood, Protection from Thyself (E, Anti-self)

Red’s namesake, a magical cloak passed down through her family. This strange article of clothing protects the wearer from their own madness. So long as the hood is up, she is protected from all self-imposed mental interference and gains strong resistances against outward intrusions upon her mind

The Wolf, Feared Demon of Foklore (A, Anti-army)

A powerful phantasmal beast that served as an ally of Red’s family. The Wolf itself is on par with a heroic spirit. He is a sentient being capable of a low level of human communication and refers to himself as Susi. He willingly subjects himself to Red, allowing her to assimilate him for short periods of time

[Tartar]

Just. . . bring him down to the level that he should be at. He's well-known but he doesn't have this massive legend that other heroes have surrounding them. He shouldn't have tons of powerful NPs, he should have one or two.

I would take the second option, there.

Okay, so here's the idea. He's a regular knight who lived in la Mancha at the time of Imperial Spain, and was a slightly misguided but in the end not insane man who tried being a knight and follow chivalry code in a world that had long since outgrown it. He knew that the age of Heroes had ended, but fully believed that its values and morals were still relevant and could be revived by him preaching the ideals of the chivalric code throughout Spain. And thus we end with a regular knight, with extraordinary conviction and belief in his ideals, living in an age that denies him and his kind.

The power has bestowed upon him by the Holy Grail the power to share his vision with another person, giving the the increased power (the improved version of the Squirehood PA) and a reality marble wherein the age of Chivalry is revived, and wherein he becomes a true hero and knight the like of Amedis of Gaul and King Arthur except their PA's.

Would that be fine?

Besides that, what do you think about parameter values? People have quite a high variance between their total values between characters (ranging from 190 to 250 so far). What is an appropriate value? For reference these are the values of characters from the VN:

Cu Chulain: 200

Alexander The Great: 240

Arthuria: 210

Archer (Shirou): 150 (+ unknown PA value)

Heracles: 280 (Presumably due to Berserker skill)

Medea: 160 (Caster)

Assassin: 150 (+ unknown PA value)

Gilgamesh: 150 (+ EX PA value):

So all but the greatest and most famous of heroes evne break the 200 stat mark. So already the characters presented here are kinda breaking the bar set by the VN. What are your thoughts on this?

[Bfroger6]

Since I like my philosophycally conceptualized Orphy, I'll post her up again, with a few changes and tweaks made after careful consideration

Character (RPer): Orpheus (Bfroger6)

Classes: Caster

Alignment: Neutral Good

Parameters

Strength: E-

Endurance: E-

Agility: E-

Mana: C

Luck: C

Phantasm: D

Class Skills

Item Construction: A (Instead of actual items, in Orpheus's case, this skill relates to the creation of poems and songs.)

Territory Creation: C

Personal Skills

Eye for Art: EX (Orpheus's songs are the source of all the world's music. As such, she possesses an extraordinary taste for the auditory arts. She can even hear the songs of all material and imaterial presences around her and, in turn, manipulate them.)

Arcane Melody: EX (An innate ability of Orpheus's to directly form spells out of the songs she plays on her lyre. As such, she needs no mana of her own, as she borrows it from the world. With her songs, she can bend the elements to her favour. It is as if her song makes the winds dance, rivers flow, earths crumble and fires burn.)

Ethereal Body: - (Having lost her actual body, the one she appears in as a Servant, even as a container, is but a shadow, making it extremely fragile and suspectible.)

Argonautica Orphica: - (A collection of songs lost to modern man. The rhythms and tones differ vastly from the current concept of music and spell the birth of everything in the world.)

Divinity: ??? (?????)

Noble Phantasms:

Apollo's Moonstring: The Lyre of Gods (D, Anti-Perception)

Orpheus's lyre is her main weapon that is able to tune itself with anything she desires. It is the source of her magic and the catalyst for the songs she weaves in her heart. The songs it plays have the power to charm all living things, and even matter itself, just by how beautiful the tunes are. It can be utilized in the form of a special attack that breaks the barrier of reality around the target and effectively incapacitates their senses, overcoming them with auditory stimuli. Those with higher magic resistance are able to resist the charm of her lyre, but normal humans and other beings will fall victim to the beautiful melody that seems to have originated from someplace beyond the realms of their understanding, but may have actually came from a place as close to them as their heart is.

Ode to the World: The Eggshell of the Cosmos is a Lyre (EX, Anti-World)

The song which has shaped the universe. It is the ultimate concept of creation, a level of conciousness reached only by the gods and those alike. It is the first and final word translated into the voice of Orpheus's lyre, a voice that can create as well as destroy. When utilized, it brings about unimaginable power, but what form it takes depends on the user. In Orpheus's case, as is expected, it takes the form of a song so beautiful, it sways the whole of the universe, and has the power to shift one's will beyond the recognition of one's senses and into a trance-like state of eudaimonia.

It has the power to tear one's world apart.

"The inescepable death and the unending life, when her lyre strikes the hand of god, all that's been will once again fly."

For Eurydice: Ballad of Light and Darkness (???, Anti-Unit/Self)

Only by one's own blood can the song of their heart and soul truly be written. By rending her own flesh, Orpheus is able to bring about not the power of the world like her other Phantasm, but the power of her conviction, a song which has so many other songs intertwined in itself. The true extent of this power is unknown.

[Shamitako]

And last repeat:

Character (RPer): Honor, the Hero's Prerogative (Alexus/SYLPHYN)
Classes: Lancer, Saber, Rider
Alignment: Lawful Good

Parameters
Strength: B
Endurance: C
Agility: A
Mana: D
Luck: E-
Phantasm: -

Class Skills
Magic Resistance A
Battle Continuation D

Personal Skills
Divinity D (Honor’s spirit is built on the frame of the minor Roman god Honos, granting her a low level of divinity)
Guardian Knight A+
Charisma A
Knight in Shining Armor A- (A skill that denotes one as willing to journey far and risk their life to save another. At this level it manifests literally as a full suit of armor. However it is rank-down due to Honor being summoned as a female while this skill is usually attributed to men)
Spear of True Honor A (Although not unique enough to be classified as a Noble Phantasm, Honor’s spear contains the might of every honorable weapon to exist, allowing it to perform on par with an A ranked Noble Phantasm and gaining a rank-up against heroes with a shallow sense of justice. It can take many forms, but primarily manifests as a spear due to Honos being depicted with a spear)

Noble Phantasms:
- (-)

As Honor does not possess a legend to call her own, she also does not possess a Noble Phantasm to represent it

[Code: PIRULUK]

This Caster is a genderbend that basically takes the original person's identity and it out the window. It probably won't be accepted, but this idea has been stuck in my head and refuses to get out, so fuck it, I'll put it here. Since the Servant is an author I took the stats and skills almost wholesale from Shakespeare/Andersen.

Character (RPer): Charlotte Brontë, alias Charles Dickens alias Currer Bell

Classes: Caster

Alignment: Chaotic Neutral

Parameters

Strength: E(++++)(+)

Endurance: E(++++)(+)

Agility: D(++++)

Mana: C++(+)

Luck: A

Phantasm: C+

Class Skills

Territory Creation C

Item Creation B

Personal Skills

Enchant A

High-Speed Incantation E

Innocent Monster D

Gender Concealment EX - As long as she makes an effort to hide it, her opponents will not be able to discern her gender.

High Society Sensibilities EX - Due to her experience passing herself as both a man and a woman in public during the highly gendered Victorian era, she has immense talent at blending into a crowd and adopting their expected mannerisms. This skill lets her attend social functions and move around in public without drawing undue attention to her.

A Girl's Education (Victorian) A - As a literate and well-educated member of society, she is well-versed in the stories and features of famous personages that lived in the Victorian era (1837-1901), as well as the famous personages that came before her. This skill lets her instantly identify any Servant who gained fame in England, from the beginning of recorded history up until the year of her death (1870). This skill only triggers if the target says or does something significant from their legend or acts in a way that is distinctive of their tale. Servants affected by this skill include, but are not limited to, Beowulf, Francis Drake, Shakespeare and members of the Arthurian legend.

Noble Phantasms:

Contemporary to the Self: Anti-Stagnation EX. An author grows through criticism. Writing different works, as two different, famous authors, Charlotte/Charles constantly criticised her own work in public, using her twin public personae to criticise and challenge each other, so that she could keep improving. While she is in battle, she constantly criticises her own performance and immediately acts on her criticism, improving her fighting capabilities on the fly. However, an author starts each new work from a blank slate. Similarly, she starts from scratch in each battle. With this NP, Charlotte's stats increase exponentially the longer she fights against the same opponent, but revert to a blank slate if she switches targets.

Victorian Duality: Anti-Self EX. Charles Dickens and Charlotte Bronte were so different in their approaches to the public eye and in the content of their stories that history remembers them as two people, despite them being one and the same. To reflect this, this NP projects her twin authorial personae into separate bodies. Dickens wears masculine clothing and has a flair for the dramatic, with high offensive capabilities but no defensive capabilities. Brontë dresses in a feminine style and is gentle yet reserved, possessing high defensive abilities but unable to attack. The two selves work together, in pursuit of the ultimate novel. This NP can be toggled on or off.

Bildungsroman: Anti-Mediocrity C. Charlotte/Charles was known to write bildungsroman novels, or coming-of-age stories. In these tales, the protagonist undergoes a series of challenges and difficulties, before ultimately emerging as a more mature and well-rounded individual. This NP is the embodiment of that: Charlotte can pick one person to write a story about (she can pick herself, as well). At the culmination of the tale, the target of this NP will have grown in strength significantly. This growth occurs over the entire course of the tale, and is permanent. The amount and type of growth experienced depends on the level of hardship faced by the target, as well as the length of the tale. This NP can only be active on one target at a time, and cannot be cancelled unless the story is concluded. The length of the tale is left to Charlotte's discretion, and the NP can only target the same individual once.

[Chevaleresse]

we do need masters, too, unless I tgrow out the original starting point and make this GO-esque or something

[Tartar]

I wouldn't mind playing a Master if needed, though I can definitely understand why the Servants have garnered so many more applicants as compared to Masters.

Honestly, it'll probably be more fun if we had multiple people play Servants and Masters separately due to the better posibilities for story-telling. But at the same time I'm worried that we won't actually be able to find 14 concurrent and active players (it's a lot of people after all). Including myself we have so far 8 applicants over the course of 2 weeks. Perhaps it's better to play with 5 /4 Masters/Servant pairs, instead of trying to wait for 14 people to join, and people can then join at later points if they find the RP interesting?

Besides that, could you explain how exactly this RP will be taking place? Do we just respond whenever something relevant happens or do we work on a daily system where we post once every day, and then you compile the posts into a narrative?

[Chevaleresse]

the former.

I planned on a minimum of 7 players and a max of 14. Playing a Servant doesn't mean you can't play a Master and vis versa.

[Shamitako]

Besides that, what do you think about parameter values? People have quite a high variance between their total values between characters (ranging from 190 to 250 so far). What is an appropriate value? For reference these are the values of characters from the VN:

Cu Chulain: 200

Alexander The Great: 240

Arthuria: 210

Archer (Shirou): 150 (+ unknown PA value)

Heracles: 280 (Presumably due to Berserker skill)

Medea: 160 (Caster)

Assassin: 150 (+ unknown PA value)

Gilgamesh: 150 (+ EX PA value):

So all but the greatest and most famous of heroes evne break the 200 stat mark. So already the characters presented here are kinda breaking the bar set by the VN. What are your thoughts on this?

Well, firstly, keep in mind that F/SN is not the only source material. And also parameters are not actually all that indicative of a servant's power

I can't speak for others, but let me speak to my own

Nessie [50+50+20+30+30+60=240]: Nessie is like, really super strong. The Loch Ness Monster is one of the most well-known urban legends of modern day. Further, there's a huge amount of mystery surrounding her. On top of this, Nessie has shenanigans tying her back to King Arthur and granting her significant power drawn secondhand from Arturia as well. Her power is the embodiment of a man's hopes magnified by Excalibur combined with her own unique legend, which has become exceedingly famous. Even taking away her shenanigans she remains very strong (and I do have a way for that to happen)

Red [10+30+20+30+20+30=140]: Red is fairly well known once more, but her power doesn't come directly from herself. Most of her parameters are fairly weak, and she instead relies on her unique powers of assimilation to perform

Susi [40+40+50+20+20=170]: The Wolf on the other hand manages to match up to a heroic spirit without any form of Noble Phantasm or other bonus. Wolves are feared and respected throughout many different cultures (Susi's name is from the Fins, who feared wolves as a symbol of destruction and literally called them "useless thing")

Honor [40+30+50+20+5=145] (Note: treating rank-down as -5 since it's stated as similar to being in-between two ranks) So Honor is actually probably the strongest of these three BTW. She's a conceptual servant, lacking in legend but gaining power from every legend that uses her. But since she has no legend, her parameters are lacking and her phantasm is nonexistent, making her appear fairly weak according to the numbers

[Noir]

More Servant options, and I'll probably just edit any new additions/changes here from here on, though for the sake of variety this is probably the first and last melee Servant I'm going to add:

Character (RPer): Peter Pan (YagamiNoir/Jhin of the Opera)

Classes: Saber, Caster

Alignment: Lawful Good

Parameters

Strength: B

Endurance: B

Agility: A+

Mana: B

Luck: A

Phantasm: A

Class Skills

Magic Resistance B

Riding C

Personal Skills

Flight B+ (Peter’s flight is bound by his emotions, the presence of Pixie Dust, and subsequently Tinker Bell and her condition; jubilant and positive feelings enable him to fly and accelerate his speed, but negative feelings, particularly fear and sadness, slow him down or cut his speed entirely.)

Charisma B

Bravery A+

Independent Action D

Battle Continuation C

Ventriloquism EX (Peter can imitate the voice of anyone he desires without significant lip movement.)

Noble Phantasms:

Tinker Bell, Fairy Companion (Anti-Self, A+)

Peter Pan is accompanied by his best friend Tinker Bell, a miniscule fairy with the natural ability to produce an infinite supply of Pixie Dust unless severely ill or weakened. Pixie Dust causes Peter and his allies to freely levitate whereas levitation hampers enemies affected. Tinker Bell acts individually though quintessentially in favour of Peter, and thus their Master’s, will and orders. Tinker Bell also glows and gives off a significant bit of light, which coincides with Peter’s next Phantasm. Capable of flight at high speeds, she also serves as an annoyance and distraction for targets, though she offers very little offensive presence. Tinker Bell does have her own personality, and while the Servant-fairy duo pair’s loyalties and responsibilities to the Master take precedent, she’s feisty, a bit hot-tempered, and gets jealous of anyone flirting or romantically involved with Peter Pan.

Living Shadow (Anti-Self, B+)

Peter Pan has a sentient shadow that splits from Peter himself and acts individually, though again in favour, of Peter and his affiliated Master. Apart from being useful as a means of defense and deception, the shadow can morph into any shape and size and has conscious-triggered intangibility and tangibility, meaning it can touch and grip things, though it is also vulnerable to being damaged and worn out; Peter's shadow cannot touch things if intangible and cannot be immune to attacks vice versa. Peter can always touch and restrict his shadow and his shadow is limited by a certain leash distance away from Peter.

Edited August 20, 2016 by YagamiNoir4896

[Shamitako]

>Three super strong phantasms

>>phantasm rating B

[Notus]

Uhmn, lot´s of servants there. As I stated, I cannot play two characters, but I could play a Master and drop my Servant. If anyone wants to use her (Hua Mulan, first page, if you missed it) please be my guest.

I´ll write a Master right away and post him/her as soon as possible. Dibs on best family, Tohsaka.

[Chevaleresse]

I might drop the "no two Masters" rule, with consideration for the experience of the RPer, of course. At this rate we won't get enough Masters otherwise.