Chevaleresse Posted May 31, 2017 Author Share Posted May 31, 2017 Mitsurugi's eyes flit over the contents of the room and Empi's state of dress - or lack thereof. Her face reddens almost imperceptibly. She's nearly as bad as the oni. . . "I heard you from down the hall, and was simply wondering what you were upset about." Her eyes seem to slide about a bit instead of making direct eye contact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted May 31, 2017 Share Posted May 31, 2017 (edited) Empi groans. She doesn't seem to notice Mitsu's exasperation, being rather exasperated herself. "I've been trying to call my boss to get a ride out of here- she accidentally sent me HERE when I was MEANT to be riding out to meet a client- but this stupid phone won't even get any reception here! Dammit, I should've bought one of those new HunieBee 5Ss instead of this crappy 4G model. Oh well, that's what I get for not asking for the upgrade when they had it free....." Edited May 31, 2017 by ElfCollaborator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 1, 2017 Author Share Posted June 1, 2017 "I. . . see." Truthfully she'd only understood about half of what the fairy had said. Which was unusual, given that it was usually the other way around with fairies. She glanced back at Laver, and then at the implements scattered about the room. On the one hand, the boy probably knew what Empi was talking about better than Mitsurugi did, but on the other, she didn't believe he really needed to see the inside of the room Empi had claimed. She seized on the only part of the statement she'd actually comprehended. "You were going to meet a client? What service do you offer?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 2, 2017 Share Posted June 2, 2017 Empi has an entirely serious look on her face. "Dating advice. That's not a euphemism." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 2, 2017 Author Share Posted June 2, 2017 "Ah." Dating advice? That was a newer term for courtship, right? She knew she'd heard of it from the few outsiders that had wandered into Gensokyo, like that one miko. . . Whatever remained of her cheer, along with her discomfort at Empi's. . . situation. . . vanished, replaced with the all-too-familiar weight of the memory of what once was. The change was visible on her face; she hadn't had a proper response to Empi before, and this certainly didn't help that situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 2, 2017 Share Posted June 2, 2017 (edited) Empi raises an eyebrow curiously. Usually, when she said she gave dating advice, most people tended to either laugh at her, call her insane, or immediately collapse on their knees and beg for everything she knew. Once, she even had a guy do all three. At once. He wasn't the easiest client, but he learned well in the end. He wasn't bad in the sack either; Empi remembered that Memorial Day weekend well. It was a fun couple of days wasted. Looking burdened, however, was a first for her in almost 400 years of advice and dealing with clients. Especially from this one; considering her looks and her general bearing, Empi figured that someone like her wouldn't have so much trouble finding someone to date or even spend the night with. Hell, she'd do it; though she preferred guys, Empi was partial to a little girl-on-girl action. The fairy tilts her head, rubbing the back of her head. "Hey....uh.....well, I mean, I suppose I could give you some advice for free. I'm sure the boss won't mind if I do some consulting on the side...." Edited June 2, 2017 by ElfCollaborator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 2, 2017 Author Share Posted June 2, 2017 "N-no, that's not necessary. I . . . that isn't the issue. I remembered something." Had she been in a different situation, a different time, she likely would have laughed at the suggestion. She'd been around for quite some time, and while her reputation had made things difficult at times, generally, if she wanted a companion, she could get one. "I'm sorry to bother you, truly." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 3, 2017 Share Posted June 3, 2017 "Oh, nononononono, it's no problem at all, really! Besides, rather this than trying to work this stupid damn phone. I really DO have to talk to the IT department about this. So, you wanna talk or....." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 3, 2017 Author Share Posted June 3, 2017 "I . . . suppose conversation could not hurt." She looked down for a moment, trying to think of an appropriate topic of conversation. "So, your profession is giving others advice on courtship? If you will pardon my curiosity, how does one get into this profession in the first place?" Mitsurugi had heard of courtesans before, of course, as well as some echoes of something people referred to as hostesses? But instead of meaning a woman hosting an event, they meant women who were, in essence, professional conversationalists. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 "I did a degree on it. Advanced Courtship Consultancy at Ishtar U. Real fun place, that was; had a roommate, she was a COMPLETE party animal! Real cute, too." Empi sighs fondly as she remarks about party animals. Her room still looks strewn with.....interesting implements. "What about you? You look like one of our competitors over in Japan. Have the whole 'raven-haired traditional lady' look around you. I say you pull it off preeeeetty well." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hal Henderics Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 Laver, who had been standing there silent, suddenly reveals why he had the funny look on his face. He promptly vomits on the floor. He backs up, apologizing profusely. "S-sorry, I-I just. I'll get a mop." He shudders, turning around, and walking to get a mop. "Saw the squirmbage in the back, oh god." One might hear him mumble as he walks off, to places where the sights he saw in that room are merely a memory. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 "I see. . ." Mitsurugi didn't have time to come up with a reply before Laver decided that his response to Empi's room was vomit. She deftly dodged to the side as she saw him start to heave out of the corner of her eye, evading any potential splatter. Really, even if he was young, that was a bit of an overreaction. . . for that matter, why did he know what anything in the room was? Mitsurugi had seen most of it before, yes, but that was what happened when one was a millenia-old goddess who spent several centuries in a relatively small geographic area with all manner of supernatural creatures with their own sets of . . . tastes. "Do you mind if I come in? It would keep out the smell." She had her own doubts about going into the room, but really, it wasn't any worse than the aftermath of an oni party. Or a lull in one, since they could potentially go for days at a time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 "Oh, sure. Lemme just, er....clean up a bit. That kid was exposed to the Internet at a WAAAAAAY too early age." Empi casually waves her hand. The vomit behind Mitsu disappears and the.....implements fly into various small bags, which order themselves on Empi's bed. Empi herself gains pajamas; the pink, heart-patterned sort, as expected. She moves aside. "Come in, make yourself at home." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 Mitsurugi stepped into the room. A cursory inspection didn't indicate anywhere that she could politely sit and carry out the remainder of the conversation, so instead she just took an additional couple of steps inward and to the side, avoiding the variety of stuffed animals scattered about the dwelling. "To answer your previous question, I am indeed Japanese. I am not, however, involved in anything related more than passingly to courtship. I am a god of natural disaster. . ." Her face took on the burdened look it had held previously, visibly drooping slightly, ". . . or, at least, I was. I know not what has happened, or will happen, to my nature." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 "Eh? Whaddya mean?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 "A god is bound to what others believe them to be. I came into being because enough humans believed that there was a god controlling the storms and quakes that shook their homes. They put their faith into me, and by doing so made me able to fulfill that. If they had come to believe that I was something else - not that there was a different god responsible for something, but that I was an entity governing something such as raw destruction, I would have become that." She sighed. "But none of that matters. Every person who would have had any faith in my existence is dead." Her tone actually started to waver at this last. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 (edited) Empi lifts an eyebrow curiously. Now this was new. She'd never heard of a case like this before, definitely not. Well, not in HER department, anyway. She sits down on her bed, moving aside most of her plushies and hugging a teddy bear to her chest, patting a spot next to her for Mitsu. "So a 'clap your hands if you believe' kind of deal? I see. Well, that kind of stuff USUALLY isn't my department- actually, we outsource that to the Greeks. Man, THOSE guys.....anyway, that's....a shame. I'm sorry to hear that." She thinks for a moment, rubbing her chin and eyeing Mitsu up and down. She gets a little distracted, of course; Mitsu was rather pretty, and she could just see the beginnings of those luscious, shapely curves- Empi clears her throat. She gives Mitsu a serious look. "You need to get laid." Edited June 4, 2017 by ElfCollaborator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 Mitsurugi sits down next to Empi somewhat hesitantly, her sullen expression remaining until Empi makes her final statement. "I need to. . . what?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 "You. Need. To. Get. Laid. You know....go out there. Make yourself known. Have a little.....fun on the side. You're still young, huh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 "You lost me." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 The look on Empi's face is one of absolute shock. ".......how long have you gone without?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 ". . . Gone without what? I do not understand your meaning." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 (edited) "Y'know, doing the deed? Making the beast with two backs? Getting busy? Donning the velvet hat? Rolling your oats? Bucking the forbidden horse? Dancing the horizontal hula? Stealing the precious thing?" Edited June 4, 2017 by ElfCollaborator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevaleresse Posted June 4, 2017 Author Share Posted June 4, 2017 Realization dawns on Mitsurugi's face. Quickly followed up by irritation. "What does the death of an entire world and the corruption of my very being have to do with my shagging somebody!?" The goddess looked almost as shocked at the suggestion as at the fact that she'd spoken the phrase "shagging somebody" out loud, as evidenced by her skin rapidly approaching a shade best described as "tomato-like." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElfCollaborator Posted June 4, 2017 Share Posted June 4, 2017 (edited) "Now, hang on. Hang on a minute. Your problem is that your whole world is dead, yes? Now, even if you don't get laid- and I'm actually obligated to say that you do, it's all down in my employment contract, we can have a look at that later if you want, it's REAAAAAL ironclad, I could get fired if I don't- I mean, you can't stay sad about losing your world forever, right? Your worshippers wouldn't want that of you, surely? I mean, yeah, you can mourn 'em, of course you should. If you didn't, you would be what we call in the business a Stinson or an Itou. In other words, we'd.....kinda think there's something wrong with you. But you can't really stay sad about the whole thing, right? It's over. Unless, well, we find a magical genie who can fix whole worlds. I DO know a guy who can do cities though, but....he's waaaay out of my salary, so I don't really talk to him much. Anyway well, if you don't get yourself known out there, well, how's that going to fix your problems? I mean, yeah, getting laid won't fix 'em, but getting people to know you will! Also it's fun! So what I'm saying is that you get out there, get known, maybe have a little bit of fun on the side aaaaand your belief problem's solved! Hopefully! Like I said, this is REAAAALLY out of my job specifications, so I'm sorta fucked on this one." Edited June 4, 2017 by ElfCollaborator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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