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Pickup Line Compilation


ArgenHyuu

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I'm not sure if there's a topic like this already since I didn't find one when I searched earlier. But anyway...

 

Post a pickup line that you think is rather unique, really funny, or you think that really hits the feels. Any kind of pickup line would be good, as long as it's not too common like "roses are red, violets are blue" kind of lines. Also, the pickup lines can be for any or one type of preference (heterosexual, homosexual, furry, etc.) as long again, it's rather unique, really funny, or you think that really hits the feels. It also doesn't matter if you just read it somewhere and it's not yours, as long as it fits what I've said earlier. It can be sexual if you want, just make sure it follows the forum guidelines and doesn't make people uncomfortable.

 

To start, let me link one of my posts with a pickup line I've read on Twitter weeks ago: http://www.rebornevo.com/forum/index.php?/profile/71387-rivalhyuu454/&status=104145&type=status

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I never thought I'd live to see the misery of accountant pick up lines. But I have had the misfortune of witnessing a colleague employ them.

 

"Hey, nice assets"

 

"You make my pants file for an extension"

 

Forgot the actual line, but it involved 'round figures'...

 

I am not joking, these were actually spoken. I cannot get over the cringe to this day.

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29 minutes ago, Ironbound said:

I never thought I'd live to see the misery of accountant pick up lines. But I have had the misfortune of witnessing a colleague employ them.

 

"Hey, nice assets"

 

"You make my pants file for an extension"

 

Forgot the actual line, but it involved 'round figures'...

 

I am not joking, these were actually spoken. I cannot get over the cringe to this day.

That's horrifying

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Find someone you love...

Pull them close...

Whisper in their ear...

"Hail Hydra."

 

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

If you ever want to leave my basement,

Say "I love you."

 

(Sorry for the grimness of these. Kind of had to.)

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10 hours ago, Isa.phoria said:

Sit on my face and I'll eat my way to your heart

 

If I were a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seeds?

 

 

#RomanceGoals

LOL

 

"Are you from Japan? Because I'm tryina get into Japan-ties"

 

 

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1 hour ago, Mockingbird said:

LOL

 

"Are you from Japan? Because I'm tryina get into Japan-ties"

 

 

I rate that 10/10 for the pun!

 

Uhm, excuse me, there's something wrong with my phone

Girl: oh, what is it?

Your number is not in it

(Girl immediately offers to help you out with your problem, hopefully)

Edited by HongaarseBeer97
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Accountant pick up lines, v2:

 

*slides a paper with phone number across to a girl who is an accountant*

"Hey, miss, can you give a report on these numbers?"

 

"Let's internalize some liquid assets while you audit my staff."

 

"Are you a pledged asset? Because I want to withhold you..."

 

"Hey, are you from Accounting? Because I'm a-counting on seeing you tonight!"

 

"I've been in public practice for a long time but I've never seen an endowment like yours."

 

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3 minutes ago, Ironbound said:

Accountant pick up lines, v2:

 

*slides a paper with phone number across to a girl who is an accountant*

"Hey, miss, can you give a report on these numbers?"

 

"Let's internalize some liquid assets while you audit my staff."

 

"Are you a pledged asset? Because I want to withhold you..."

 

"Hey, are you from Accounting? Because I'm a-counting on seeing you tonight!"

 

"I've been in public practice for a long time but I've never seen an endowment like yours."

 

Maybe I'm being optimistic but I'm hoping these weren't also said by your aforementioned colleague

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No, these weren't. Not yet, anyway...

 

he might actually try the phone number one though, if he hasn't already done it

 

I found these on the internet because they're fun to examine in a cringey way. But that's maybe because accountancy innuendos are ultranerdy.

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If you're feeling down, I can feel you up.

 

That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too.

 

Hey Baby! I'd like to use your thighs as earmuffs.

 

Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore - my face should be among them.

 

I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get!

 

You're welcome

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4 minutes ago, Isa.phoria said:

If you're feeling down, I can feel you up.

 

That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too.

 

Hey Baby! I'd like to use your thighs as earmuffs.

 

Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore - my face should be among them.

 

I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get!

 

You're welcome

 

*proceeds to write them down for later use*

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