Brailens Gifted

[Felicity]

For a while I've been sitting on my hands saying to myself "i'm going to write a novel with all these ideas in my head" but i had never gotten around to it. So i'm going to kill two birds with one stone. I'm gonna start writing and posting here when possible to drive me to write, and i'm also going to ask your thoughts and criticisms on it.

This is first post is a brief history of the world of Brailen and will likely be the prologue if i consider it up to snuff. This will probably heavily edited, so don't count anything but the abilities as permanent. I want the abilities to make a wide range of characters formidable in their own right and to add some pomp and drama and whatnot.

A brief history on the world of Brailen.

--- Any thing in between the three dashes is unknown to the people of Brailen and is just there to explain something that won't be known by the characters until an opportune time or when it's necessary

---

Brailen was just a rock born of the universe like any other, no special relevance to it. it was just a rock, drifting through space until it settled in the orbit of a star, the third planet in a solar system, the two other planets balancing the gravitational pull and creating a solar system. A simple galaxy born of simple circumstance. No reason or desire or sentience behind it. Due to Brailens position in the orbit, it became an ideal place for development and after a long period of change, it became habitable. The various bits of debris scattered amongst the universe gathered, and basic lifeforms came to be on Brailen.

---

At some point, the planet had reached a point where it was brimming with life and creatures, with the smartest and most imaginative coming to rule thanks to the resourceful nature of their races. this was the race of humans of course. Can’t have a story without them.

---

There was another race that rivaled the humans, Being superior with their skills of inexplicable abilities though their names and lives were long lost. There are remnants of them, but nothing more than primitive temples. They weren’t exactly an omniscient race like most of fiction likes to pretend with their own Ancients.

---

As humanity grew, so did their culture and habitats. They spawned awesome cities and devices, even creating worlds and universes through the use of their language. Some created the idea of an omnipotent being and began worship. This idea spread until there were countless branches of worshippers, each with a different deity, though none proving stronger or more accurate than any other religion. Soon enough the Humans had created too much to keep track of. This point marked the beginning of records and the storing of information, the very first year in the calendar. Naturally alongside all of this creation and ingenuity there was conflict, destruction. Empires rose and fell, marking the history of Brailen like the commas and full stops in this very text.

Eventually, humans turned the creativity that made them so amazing to conflict, and wrought terrible machines and weapons that they eventually tore each other apart with. All the while, Brailen bore the burden of the warring humans, taking the toll alongside the remaining wildlife. These battles resulted in the near total reset of the human race, Brailen erupted in calamities that razed the landscape in response to the pollution of the weapons, destroying so much of what the humans had made. All the few remaining pockets of civilisation had was their language, the little amounts of knowledge from the memory of the few specialists that survived and the tales of their history, which were handed down in the few remaining pieces of literature and by word of mouth. Naturally, some of this knowledge was lost to gaps in between generations.

The humans sheltered in the temples that had been on Brailen for as long as anyone could remember, and learned to survive and live once more, but eventually they developed more than their long unused instincts. At some point, a few people developed abilities as strange and unique as the person wielding them. No one knew who was the first, but soon there was at least one of these people in every pocket of civilisation, if not more depending on how each group reacted. There was, of course, resentment from some and they rejected these people despite the fact that some of these abilities were as docile and helpful as simply urging a seed to grow.

---

These people came about because of their desire to survive and exposure to the old temples. Remember those things? With the second race?

---

The humans had scrabbled and clawed their way to creating civilisation, and in doing so rediscovered many things, and discovered a few more things that were overlooked during the first cycle of development thanks to the new abilities that were now nearly a regular part of life. Now, naturally religion had persevered throughout all of this time,and some acclaimed the people as gifts from their lords. Despite the malice from those that resented the gifted, and the mass amounts of sceptics who denied this, the name stuck and the people were dubbed the Gifted. The creativity of humanity didn't exactly shine that day.

Soon enough, alongside the government, various establishments were created to support the Gifted, to school them and find the more problematic Gifted a place in society

Eventually, the humans rebuilt, and flourished once more to a state of civilisation, though it was a far cry from their peak. And this is where the story begins, the year 5079, 2697 years after the “Reset” as people had refereed to it, lacking the desire to call it anything else.

But enough with these tales. They have made their place in history.

It’s time for my tale to do the same.

[Sutoratosu]

Well, this seems quite interesting. Keep it up, Dobby. Right now I don't really see anything the could use any urgent editing. tell us more about this little world you have crafted.

[Felicity]

This is what happened after that passage above. This is how i feel most of the story will be told, via Darrens Point of View.

Part 1: Introductions to the World

Chapter 1

It was the third day of the second quarter of the year. I was busily stuffing my bags with my possessions, and a fair bit of food alongside it.

I was in my small, cosy little room, too little in my opinion. I hated the fact that i could only barely fit my bed in on the far end of the room, or that I had to squeeze my desk right next to the rickety door. Why? This meant that whenever someone absent-mindedly opened the door, it would crash into the desk and send all my miscellaneous bits of leather or stone all about the desktop, and add another bit f damage to the already damaged door. The mirror that I had placed on the desk had fallen countless times because of this, and now showed only a distorted cracked view whenever I looked at it. Not that it was perfect to begin with. Whenever I’d look into it before it got brutalised, I still had to look past a good amount of dirt and grime to see my sharp, slightly hooked nose and almost pointed chin. I could never tell if my hair and eyes really were the same shade of mud brown as the gunk marring the mirror, but Sabrina assured me they were actually chocolate brown. To the present day, i still have not seen a “chocolate”.

I should Introduce myself. My name is Darren Aerilyn. I’m in my twenty first year, and I live with on my own in the school quarter of Trevalus, the third largest settlement created by humans since the Reset. I’m apparently six feet and one inch in height, not that I can check for myself. As i said before, my hair is either chestnut or mud brown, and I normally keep it cut short to keep it out of my way. Finally, you should know that I’m one of the Gifted. I first used my powers when i was 6 and was chucked off to the School as soon as the Lawmen found out. I’ve been using my powers ever since.

As i was focusing on my task of packing my already near- bursting bag, I failed to notice a presence creeping up behind me. Just as I picked up another loaf of bread to jam into my poor, bursting bag, a tiny, nimble pair of hands plucked it out of my own mitts.

“thank you Wyn” Chimed a familiar voice.

Sighing, I turned around to find Sabrina handing a small chunk of bread to the tiny humanoid figure on her shoulder.

“I kind of needed that you know” I complained, knowing full well that i wouldn't get it back.

“You should have taken more care of it then” She replied curtly, grinning as she turned her head to look at me.

Sabrina was a small woman, with long pale blonde hair, pale green eyes and delicate features and a tiny little nose that could Enspell any man, Gifts or not. She was wearing a light green dress that accentuated her small proportions just enough to catch the eye of an idle watcher. Wyn, her teeny little pet, was lounging on Sarina’s shoulder. She only ever dressed like this when she was planning something.

“So, what’s with the outfit? Are you off to find another poor sod to fleece?”

“Not at all! How could you think of me so?” she responded, pouting in a way that would crack the stoniest of hearts. Luckily, when it comes to Sabrina my heart is made of Iron.

“Because the last time you were looking like this, I had to explain to an angry group of church goers why their priest had renounced his faith in their God to run away and get married.” I recount, giving her my most sceptical look.

“Irrelevant. You should trust me more! Ah, but talking about this isn't what i’m here for. I wanted to see you off before you head to the School.”

She was referring to the mandatory visit to the school. At graduation, every student is told to report back to the school on a certain day to serve as a teacher for the day and to make sure we are doing okay for ourselves after graduation. Today was my turn.

“I’m sure that I’ll make it to the School fine enough. You don’t need to accompany me you know” I said this, but it felt nice that she was somewhat concerned. There had been a few people from our old class that had not had a good time on their days, and I was nervous, not sure what made their time such a pain “That said, I need to head out.” I rose and moved towards the door before Sabrina could respond, moving at a pace that Sabrina nearly had to jog to keep up with.

“Would you slow down?” Sabrina whined “You know I have to work to keep pace with you like this”

“That’s the point” I said as I glanced back. Sabrina had stopped walking, and had crossed her arms, Wyn was imitating her stance. “Fine, follow me if you want” I slowed my pace so Sabrina could follow easier.

Soon, we settled into our morning banter, jabbing back and forth whilst we strolled through the bustling streets. It was morning, and people had fallen right into their daily lives. Most people don’t have a gift and often have to work the market to get enough of a living to survive, so as we moved along, people called out to us to try and get a sale. From what i’d heard, the merchants quarter was much worse. There was supposedly a vast bazaar where you could purchase any number of things until we reached our destination. Standing at the grand black gates brought back some faded memories of my first sight of them. At the age of 6, these things terrified me, and certainly didn't make me more eager to enrol.

“Right, I’ll see you later then. Try not to get into too much trouble, Ok?” I asked, hoping she would actually try this time.

“I’ll try.” She promised “Good luck in there. Find me at 'Nallys later,” She walked off, waving as she went.

***

The entirety of the school is a large complex split into five sections. The library to the north, the combat area to the south (This was done in hopes of not burning the precious books to ash), then there’s the storerooms to the west, the residences to the east and the main offices and classes in the centre of it all. The gates led in from the north-west whilst the rest of the grounds are surrounded by a vast forest that was grown with the help of some Gifted. The forest served as a foraging area and a place for the various creatures made or called by the few Gifted capable of such things. Sabrina was one such Gifted, able to summon a small unit of five “Fae” as she liked to call them. From what Sabrina told me, Wyn was the first she called, and hasn’t left her side since.

I had been told to report to the Heads office upon arrival, so i trudged towards the main building. There was a strong scent of smoke in the air, and there were loud explosions coming from the combat area. Seemed like there was at least one dangerous person there.

I hoped i was not going to be the centre of one of those explosions any time soon.

As I entered the office building, a building that reminded me more of a shelter than an office building. Looking around, it was just as plain and organised as I remembered. There were several wooden chairs with ratty pillows in a line for those waiting. The walls were a horrid colour of white that always makes me think of a sickly persons skin, and in the far end of the room next to the door leading further into the building, there was a desk with a woman writing furiously with a quill and ink. I guess she didn't merit a fancy pen.

I approached the desk, and as i reached it the woman looked up from her papers. She was an old crone, with all the wrinkles and scowling capability that comes with the title. I’d occasionally seen her during my time in the School, but thankfully she had little to do with the Students.

Before i had a chance to speak, she started babbling “Well, well here you are Mr Aerilyn, you seem to be rather late” I was not thank you very much. Not that i said that. “However, the Head seemed intent on waiting. You may go through the door and meet the head” She said this last line like she was granting me permission to be free and happy. I suppose she’d need some grandeur in this job to avoid losing sanity. Whether it worked is another matter entirely.

I nodded and proceeded through, navigating the corridors until i came to an ostentatious set of polished oak doors with fancy engravings on it. Naturally this is where the Heads office was. I went to knock, but before my knuckles could rap on the wood, the door drifted open. I looked inside and the Head looked just as shocked as I was.

The Head was a Small, somewhat pudgy man who overall didn't have much of a presence. This made him seem much less powerful than he really was. This man struck nervous anxiety into the hearts of even the strongest of the Gifted, simply because he was the one man willing to snap at a group of stupidly powerful teenagers with no abilities of his own. This man commanded the respect of every Gifted to go through the School of Trevalus

And he still had a look of shock and mild awe on his face as the door opened, seemingly of it’s own accord.

“Well then Master Aerilyn, either your power has a mind of it’s own and a taste for pomp, or Lady fate has struck once more.” His words made me nervous. Throughout our Schooling, there was one tenant that had struck home for everyone but the truly arrogant.

To lose control is to lose your life.

I still gave a nervous chuckle “I suppose so.” I had decided beforehand to get this business over with quickly, so I cut to the chase. “Sir, i’m sorry, but can we get to the teaching?”

This elicited a chuckle from his ever-so-slightly wobbling jowls.

“I’m afraid that will have to wait. You and I have to have a chat.”

End

[Sutoratosu]

reading this reminded me of something... my first novel idea. it was a bit like this one, but it was dead-set in the science fiction genre. basically the gist of the idea was that following some war/ catastrophe that left the world humbled and weary, a new type of human began to emerge in the dominant levels of society, humans created during the wars... Humans who are the descendents of those individuals who were "enhanced" for War-fare purposes, genetically altered to unlock the secrets of the "Junk DNA" that lies inside all human beings... secrets that proved to be quite useful in armed conflict and intelligence.

(Junk DNA is what scientist currently classify as DNA that the Human Genome project can not find any purpose for; IE, they don't know what significance it has or what it effects, so the assumption is that it's... well, that it's just junk.)

Yeah, the idea went through several revamps and complete plot rewrites over the course of over a year because I kept feeling like something just wasn't right about it. so this above is pretty much the only concrete aspects of it that I could give you. eventually, I got into RPing on here, and developed new worlds and new stories that I found far more interesting... and so this idea has pretty much just been sitting on the backburner for several months. I can even recall the name of the main protagonist I was dead set on using: Ezekiel Wyrm. The first name coming from a biblical prophet and the surname coming from beasts of ancient legend. but like the idea, he too was ultimately pushed into the back of my mind.

Reading this inspires me abit... perhaps someday in the future, I'll decide to brush off Zeke's (Zeke is How I would've referred to him for the majority of the story) story and give him a day in the sun.

But enough about me ranting on about my old ideas gathering cobwebs in the abyssal plain of my neural network, let's take a look at what you've got here.

Alright, Dobby, this is looking quite good from this little preveiw of chapter 1. Not very often when you find a Fantasy-inclined story, like I assume this is, that is narrated in the first person, but I think it'll work quite well with this. Even though not a whole lot has been revealed about "Gifts" I feel from what information we have been given so far that you have a well thought out, diverse, and unique system for them. looking forward to see what you got in store for that.

I'm also loving these little insights and internal comments of Derren about the people he interacts with. adds a bit of comedy to the story.

overall, this is looking quite good, but you may want to look Proper formatting for novels, things like hanging indents, etc.

Edited August 20, 2014 by Stratos

[Felicity]

Generally, as far as a system goes it's fairly simple but gives me a lot of freedom with what I can do.

In order to use a gift, there has to be a set amount of requirements to bring it about. The most common is the will to use it, but the more powerful gifts may require something to be present. For example, after Sabrina summoned Wyn, Wyn became the conduit for summoning meaning Wyn must be present for Sabrina to use her gift

Then there are also drawbacks. I'll use Sabrina as an example again. She can summon her Fae, but they must stay near enough for Wyn or Sabrina to keep track of it, meaning that Sabrina cannot use them as a messenger or scout without being nearby. Naturally the plus side to this downfall is that the Fae have the ability to essentially charm people through song.

Naturally, here are gifts that can be expanded upon with enough creativity or understanding of it, but most people find the limits of their Gift before graduation. Most

Each Gift has at least one achilles heel for every bonus and the strong Gifts require more to be used. Simple, but effective.

Also, a lot is unknown about Gifts, such as why or how. As the story progresse, i'll go into more detail as to the mechanics of the Gifts

[Felicity]

Chapter 2

Joy. I wanted to spend as little time around this man as possible. I’d rather not draw any kind of attention, even if it was his job to speak to me. That said, I gave him a short nod in response. As he started speaking, he fell into the rhythm of a man reciting a speech for the thousandth time.

“Mr Darren Aerilyn, Graduate of the School and a recognised Gifted, you have been recalled for a summary of your time since graduation, and a session of teaching the next generation. Do you have any issues with this?” When I answered with the negative he continued “Very well then, please report your time since graduation.”

***

It had been almost a year since I had left the School. after graduation, the School like to take a “Sink or Swim” approach. They send the majority of us out into the world one at a time as each student was confirmed to be far enough away from the School. Most people who leave tended to be fine, assuming that they stay in the School quarter, the people there are the most accommodating of the Gifted and there are several places a gifted can find work. Unfortunately, I had always been useless with directions and I managed to find my way into the Military quarter. This is where all the normal people go to learn combat experience for themselves and is where all war based information that Trevalus possess is stored. Unfortunately ths place was the most hostile towards the gifted. It had always been that way, as long as anybody could remember. After all, they were training for the idea of fighting a Gifted and the only info they had on Gifted was how dangerous we could be. This meant that the people who never ventured away from the Military quarter developed some bad thoughts. At least, that’s how I always thought it was.

Anyway, as I went further into the quarter I couldn't fail to notice the groups of men and women undergoing training with swords, bows, spears etcetera. Eventually I found a place to eat and drink with my meagre savings from the School. This is where I met Warrel. He was the owner of the establishment, an older man, maybe in his fifties, with salt and pepper hair that showed some of his age and several chips and dents in his face. It turned out that I hadn’t been the first Gifted to ever wander into the Quarter and I probably wouldn’t be the last. He saw how I handled myself and put the pieces together, setting me on the right path and, after thanking him, I ventured back the my original destination.

Unfortunately, things weren't that simple. As I walked I was ambushed by a group of men, nearly the same age me, ranging from nineteen to twenty three at the most from the looks of it. They began spouting some prejudiced stuff that I was appalled to hear at the time. An unfortunate result of being sent to the school is that most newly graduated Gifted didn’t have any experience with the majority of racists throughout Trevalus. Their words goaded me into attacking, and I got severely trounced. Thankfully they left me unconscious and ended things there, satisfied with their work.

Soon enough, I awoke on a bed, with Warrel of all people watching me.

“You boy need to learn some sense”

Once I had recovered somewhat he dragged me to a private combat area and proceeded to beat me down, always saying that the best way to teach some sense is to beat it into someone. Eventually I learned to dodge his attacks, and as the weeks passed I learned to counter and to anticipate, to an extent. Once he was satisfied I could take care of myself (This point came when I only needed half a day in bed after our sessions, rather than two days) he sent me off on my way back to the school district after making me promise to repay him for the food and lodging.

You’re probably wondering why I didn’t just use my Gift during the fights. That’s because I had never really learned to use it in an offensive capacity, but i’ll get to that later.

Eventually I came to the School district, much later than originally planned. There I managed to contact Sabrina, who after leaving the School herself had become quite established in the short time that had passed. It bears notice that it had been a third of a year since leaving. Sabrinas Gift was what allowed her to thrive. I believe I mentioned before but she is able to summon a unit of pixies. Those little buggers have the capability to sing a tune that affects peoples emotions. This was perfect for Sabrina, who was the most manipulative girl i had ever met.

With Sabrinas help, I got myself established, she managed to get me a job at ‘Nallys, the local inn. Using the money I earned I managed to scrape out a living and eventually I paid Warrel back. I hadn’t heard anything from him since my debt was resolved. Time went by with few noteworthy events. However, I had kept up some martial training and in dong so, found several new uses for my Gift.

***

“And that’s it. That’s the majority of what happened” And I wasn’t lying. Outside of some minor personal issues that had already been resolved, there was nothing else.

The Heads eyes bored into me, trying to detect the half truths or lies in my face.Eventually he nodded, accepting my tale as the truth.

“Very well. There doesn’t seem to be any need for immediate intervention, though you seem t have settled yourself into a rather humdrum routine” I had no clue what “Humdrum” meant, but I didn’t let that show. Never unknowingly show a lack of knowledge to a teacher, because they’ll be happy to fill you in on it, whether you want to know or not. “I suppose you had better get down to the Combat area for your turn as a teacher. You said you had develped your Gift? I hope to see that in action.” And with that, I was dismissed.

***

As I walked south towards the sounds of various explosions, I adjusted my mindset, just as I did before my training. As I said before my Gift isn’t strictly offensive, but recently I found some uses for it in action, but it’s use hinges on my awareness of my surroundings and the space around me. When I arrived I had reached a state of calm, assessing the area. It was a large field with trampled grass surrounded by forest, as well as a few battered target dummies in a line in the far end. There were 5 benches placed around the edges of the field for anyone who simply wanted to spectate. As I was doing this, a large bear of a man, all hair and bulk, shouted a greeting. Up close, he really was massive. As tall as me, but with much more muscle on his frame. His face was covered with a great beard that most men could only aspire to, and great bushy eyebrows that almost hid the bright blue eyes beneath.

“Well, if it isn’t Darren! How are you doing boy? I suppose you’re here for the mandatory teaching?” Coach Bigby beamed at me as he spoke. The coach was by far the students favourite teacher, not just because of his friendly demeanour and the class he taught, Practical. It was also the way he tried to bring out the potential of all the Gifted, regardless of their ability. Most people, myself included, dreaded the first practical lessons, assuming it would be a series of Duels pitting us against the more combat oriented Gifted. Thankfully, Bigby was smart enough to see that as a very bad idea and worked to help us find the best use of our Gift.

“Yes sir.” I replied amiably. “I got dragged in and just got away from the Head”

This brought a great belly laugh from the man. “Yes, that man can certainly be unnerving if you don’t know him well. Any way, we better get on to things. I’m going to tell you now, there are a few bad eggs in this bunch. They just got out of their theory classes and are cockier than the average group. The problem is that they are justified with their arrogance, a few of these kids have some pretty strong Gifts, and the potential to use them.”

I scanned the group, there were about eight of them, a fairly large year group, each of them maybe 16 or 17 years old. Usually around that age people advance to actively honing their skills with their Gift. There were five girls, and three boys from what I could tell. From this distance, I couldn’t tell if one of them was a somewhat feminine guy. Each of them were wearing the standard practical gear of a white shirt and shorts with the exception of one girl who was wearing trousers and a rather thick vest. They were all standing in a semi circle, waiting for Bigby and I to address them.

“So Darren. I assume you’ll want to take the speech option rather than a practical demonstration?” Bigby asked. I didn’t blame him. A year ago, a practical demonstration with my powers wouldn’t have been very impressive.

That was a year ago.

“Actually, I think i’ll take the practical option”

Before he could respond, I marched up to the group of teenagers, putting on my most confident face, and thinking of my words five seconds before I said them. If Bigby thought they were arrogant, the only way they’d listen to what I had to say was if I proved myself better. Me Alpha Dog. Grrrrr.

“Okay then Boys and Girls. My names Darren Aerilyn and I’m your teacher today.” I pounded my words out with a tempo and tone that hid the lack of surety I was feeling.

“First things first, Who was making the explosions that I was hearing earlier?”

All of them looked directly at the girl in the vest. “Okay then, why don’t you do it one more time, wherever you were doing it before.” The girl raised an eyebrow in curiosity, but nodded and marched over to stand 20 or so feet away from a target dummy. She closed her eyes and focused for a single second before opening them and snapping her arm towards her target. A flashy ball of white fire raced towards the dummy, exploding upon impact with a mighty explosion.I tried my best not to conceal my shock. To do something like that with such speed and precision, not that explosions require that, was impressive at her age. Unfortunately, most of her classmates didn’t bother hiding their admiration, awe plain on their faces, except for two of the boys, who were looking rather sulky. That would give somebody an ego boost if it happened as often as I supected. The girls display almost made me rethink my plan, but I went ahead anyway. At that point, I didn’t know what else to do.

“Good Job, give yourself a cookie once you’re done patting yourself on the back.” I scorned her, a smirk plastered on her face. I wanted to call out the kisd on the fact that they were pretty much sucking the girls egodick, but i didn’t know how Bigby would take that. Moving on, I began to walk towards the poor dummy. Oddly enough, the flames had dissipated quickly. I turned around to face the group, all of them were watching me intently. Bigby was standing back behind the group, watching with curiosity.

“Now then. Fire another blast at me. Throw your best” I commanded. a wave of surprise flowing across the faces of the teenagers. I guessed right. Explosive Gifts are Rare, and often very powerful. It wasn’t too much of stretch to guess that she was the strongest in the group.

“Are you sure?” she asked, a slight smirk breaking the surprised look she had a second ago. She wasn’t taking me seriously at all. I didn’t respond at all. The girl shrugged and prepared another blast. This time, the white was tinged with a variety of colours, Blue was the most prominent, but there were shades of light green, red and yellow evident in the flame. It took her several seconds more to build this flame up and she appeared to be struggling. Maybe she did take my order seriously.

Several more seconds passed before she flung the roaring flame directly for my head.

See, My gift, is the gift to freeze the air. The few books that survived told us of how the air is made of different little pingng bits of air called “Molecules” flying through the spaces inbetween objects. My gift is the ability to take control of these molecules and arrange them in bulk. After experimentation, I found I can control the main portions of the air called oxygen and nitrogen.

As the bundle of fun was flying towards me, I seized the air around me and marshalled it in front of me, making an invisible wall of thin air. The fire collided with the wall with a ground shaking impact and the flames ate the consruct quicker than a piece of firewood, until they dissipated into nothing.

The looks of shock on the faces of almost everyone present made it very difficult for me to maintain my stony face, a smirk tugging on the edges of my mouth. From their point of view I should have been engulfed in multicoloured flame after being blasted several miles back. Instead the flame detonated and dispersed for no apparent reason. The only one who wasn’t surprised was my old teacher.

“Anyone else want to take a crack at me?” I goaded. It was a simple ploy. I had established myself as stronger than the girl. If someone else beat me, they would look all the better. One of the boys, almost as bulky as Bigby, stepped up. A cocky grin on his face. So sure of himself. It made me wonder about my attitude at his age. “What, do you want us to beat you? Not much of a challenge”

“All you have to do is hit me with your Gift.” Nothing about my tone, expression or body language changed as I said this. With my challenge put forth, the young man charged at me, his body taking on slight metallic sheen.He lumbered towards me, too slow for even someone of his considerable size. He sill closed the gap between us fairly quickly, winding his arm back to launch a punch towards my gut. It was ridiculously easy to see where his punch was coming from. How he expected to land a blow was beyond me. as his punch arced towards me, I bent my legs and hopped upwards twice, putting a platform of air beneath me each time. When the boy looked up to find me standing above him I took my opportunity, releasing my hold on the air and land on the young man, wrapping my legs around his thick neck and dragging him down to the ground where I held him in place with a hold Warren showed me. Soon enough the boy gave in, unable to use his strength to break free of my hold. He did put up one hell of a struggle though. He marched back to the group, shamed and hopefully with a deflated ego.

“Do any of you know why these two could not touch me?” I asked the teenagers. A small, nervous looking girl raised her hand. When I nodded at he she spoke in a very small voice, almost a whisper.

“Was it because of your Gift?”

I was somewhat disappointed in this answer. It was true, but not what I was looking for.

“Yes and no. These two failed to hit me because I could anticipate what they were going to do. Both are your attacks were signalled clear as day. Granted, I knew she-”

“Clarice” The fire girl broke in

“Don’t interrupt. I knew Clarice would attack, yes, I did order her to after all. But it was blatantly obvious as you were preparing your fire when you would launch, providing me the opportunity to counter. Speed is your friend as a combative Gift user. Even someone like me, who is not combat oriented, could overcome you. Furthermore, do not underestimate someone without combat Gifts. A little bit of creativity and good timing can be all they need to solve a problem.” As I spoke I could see the lesson taking hold in their faces. Good, i’d taught them, even if it was a remarkably short lesson. Time to leave. ASAP. I began walking towards the Combat areas exit. Bigby gave the kids some instructions then came after me.

“Since when did you learn to make platforms and walls with your Gift like that?” So he had figured it out. Before graduation, the most imaginative use for air I could muster was as a form of bonds or to trip someone.

“It just took a bit of creativity and learning the timing. The problem is that if i’m unaware of an object near to me, It could affect how fast I can move the nearby air and mess it all up.” I admitted to him.

“Well, at least you found a good use for it I suppose” As optimistic as ever.We talked for a while about how the students were doing and how a few of my old classmates did on their days. I now understood why they had a hard time. That group could have made my time difficult if I hadn’t taken the initiative. Soon enough I was back at the gates to the School, and on my way to 'Nallys

[Felicity]

Short chapter, I'm still finding my feet with the characters and setting. this feels like a rushed chapter to me. Thoughts?

Chapter 3

I wound my way through the streets, hoping to get to ‘Nallys and start my shift. The School quarter is fairly easy to navigate, with several shops and restaurents to mark the individual streets, even if most of the housings were indistinct. How I got lost after graduation is beyond me

I rounded the corner to come to the bar I worked at, ‘Nallys. To my knowledge no one knew what ‘Nallys was short for, but that’s what was read on the sign hanging in the front. I opened the door, not expecting anyone to be in the room. It was a small bar that couldn’t hold a great many patrons but it drew enough customers to stay afloat, there were a few tables and chairs scattered in the middle of the room and there were several empty booths waiting for tonights visitors. Normally the rea around the door was vacant due to the fact that it was rather heavy and anyone standing near it would likely get a good bruise if they wee near it.

So when I knocked a man the size and shape of a small boulder I was naturally rather shocked. As the man climbed to his feet, cursing all the way, I scanned the room to see Vicky,the bar owner. Vicky was a tall woman five foot eleven, with medium length hair the colour of chestnuts. Her pale, beautiful features were twisted into shock and a little bit of worry. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t somewhat infatuated with her at some point, though that faded as time went by. I began to ask the man if he was alright when he pointed an accusatory finger and started yelling. “What on Earth do you think you’re doing you imbecie!I could have you arrested for LOOKING at me, let alone knocking me to the ground! Do you know who I am?”

My tongue took the initiative “A narcissist?”

This did not help the mans temperament. “I am Girard Trevalus, second cousin to the mayor of Trevalus!” So, basically a low ranking noble. If you weren’t a part of the Mayors immediate family most nobles only had limited power. The man, Girard, turned to Vicky

“Madam, who is this idiot who barged in on our proceedings?” His tone suggested something other than a conversation. As my minor shock faded, I took note of the twos clothing. It looked as though they had just got dressed. What on earth was happening here? Vicky took that moment to speak up, stepping towards me to try to usher me out of the door.

“Your shift doesn’t start for another half an hour” She hissed, though not quiet enough for the man to miss it.

“This fool works here? Miss Gadarne, I demand that you terminate his service immediately, unles you wish to lose my” The slightest of pauses “Support” I began to see what likely happened. For a long time, Vicky had been in debt, barely able to fend off the “Collectors wiht her earnings from ‘Nallys. I desperately wanted to help, but not nly were the collectors Gifted with more combat inclined Gifts, but they also had the law on their side. Vicky had signed a contract, and the men were collecting what they were owned. It seemed Vicky had taken the choice to enlist some help from someone higher up. It wasn’t hard to figure out how she had got that help.

To be fair, Vicky tried to efute him, but her feeble attempts at pacification were thwarted by the mans tatrum. Soon enough it boiled down to an ultimatum. She looked at me with an apologetic look in her eyes. “I’m sorry Darren, but I need this.” Fucking Great

“Fine, but i’ll be talking to you later” The heat in my voice surprised me. It came out harsher than I had expected, rather than the quiet, smouldering anger I had expected. Before anymore could be said, I charged out of the room, my exit as abrupt as my entrance, except for the fact I was leaving jobless. I began walking off to the right, thoughts buzzing in my head. I was feeling slightly numbed, detached now. That had eded far too quickly and that said many things. For one, the fact that Vicky would drop me that fast on the whim of the man she was whoring herself out to that quickly stung. Furthermore, it said that I needed t get ahold of my tongue. An apology and quick exit could have ended that with a much happier resolution. My comment had not helped at all.

I was wandering through the streets , my mind pondering what had happened when I heard a familiar voice. The small figure of Sabrina bounced up to me. “Hey Darren, are you ok?” Sabrina bore a concerned look. I must have really looked sad if she was depressed.

“Yeah, is it okay if I fill you in later?” I wanted to get some more thinking done. the loss of my job had some big implications of my life. For one, I needed a new one quick. My small room was not cheap, despite it’s size. Unfortunately, Sabrina was not easily shaken. her blonde eyebrows furrowed and she grabbed my arm.

“”C’mon. You need a drink.” She lead me through the streets, which had gone full swing into the bustling nature of the streets.. The sun was midway through the sky, Indicating it was noon. She lead me to he own apartment, located near the center of the School quarter, whereas I was near the outskirts of the city itself. She walked to the wooden Ice box where she stored some skins filled with expensive whiskey and brough them out, handing me one. I had only gotten drunk once in my life, and at this point I wanted to experience some of it again.

I took a swig of whiskey, letting the liquid fre burn my worries away, letting the fraying edges of my mind fade slightly.

“I got fired” I blurted out.

“Ok, but there has to be something more than that. You looked like you had been told your hero had been slaughtered”

“Vicky fired me because the man she was asking for money wanted me fired for kncking im on his ass. From what it looked like, when I walked in, they were just done with the negotiations.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I mean she was done practically selling herself to the fat fuck”

Sabrina promptly called her a whore

I suppose that was her way of supporting me. Sabrina walked over to me and stood directly in front of me, close enough to be uncomfortable, but not close enough to be intimate. She had an uncharacteristically serious look in her eyes.

“Listen to me Darren” She commanded with more force than I‘d ever heard from her. “You will be fine. You jsut need to find something to steady yourself”

I feel I should address that it probably seems I was taking this rather harder than I should have been, but I have to say that it was due to the big change thatt had taken place. I had never been one to easily deal with change. I was sent to the School when I was six and was immediately placed into a strict structure of lessons and curfews that left little room for change. As soon as I left the care of Warrel, I immediaely sought out a routine job. Being unceremoniously dumped from said routine had me confused and disoriented. Where was I supposed to go from there?

Sabrina knew this, and knew just what to say.

I considered her words. It was a good idea, find something to focus on, to devote my attention to. “What would you suggest?”

“Well, a new job would be a start. But I think you” She poked a finger in my chest “ have something to resolve with Vicky” She gave me a wry grin

She was right.

[Felicity]

Ok, I was in the perfect mood to write, but then I pressed the back button after writing a bigass chunk of text. Some changes to minor things.

Chapter 4

It had been a couple of days since I was fired from Bralans ('Nallys). I had tried to find Vicky to get her side of the story and hopefully end things on a not so bitter note. I had decided that morning to try again to find her at Bralans due to the fact that that was her home and workplace.

I was walking through the streets, the autumn light from the overhead sun beat down, brightening the city and the various homeless men and women still waking up. The sun felt harsher than normal, the light reaching every corner of the street. A strangely optimistic sight, despite what would happen if I found Vicky.

Soon enough, I came to the entrance of Bralans, and walked through the front doors. I nodded to Lucas, a young manlike me, with orrible acne and lanky, brown hair. He nodded back. "She's in her room, just got done with some uppity dick." He said. Lucas knew I needed to sort something out with Vicky and we had gotten along when we were co-workers. I thanked him and walked through an oak door to a hallway with a few doors and a flight of stairs at the end. At the top of these stairs was a shoddy wooden door that signalled it was Vickys room. I climbed the stairs and knocked lightly.

Behind the door was some shuffling sounds and Vickys voice drifted out. "Who's there? Is that you Darren?" She guessed, right on the mark.

"Yes it's me. We need to talk" I said, raising my voice to make damn sure she heard me. I tried to keep my voice steady, wanting to not sound like the barely post pubescent boy I really was.

More to come, i think